Posted in March 2008

Enough to drive you NUTS!

Source: Myriad Life
Sunday 30th March 2008, 8:44pm

I can't stand seeing any more propaganda re Alzheimers. All this rubbish about if you keep your brain active, if you eat folic acid, if you ease up on the alcohol and stop smoking, ENOUGH!

Dr Mark Porter in the EDP on Saturday needs to go back and read what he has written and perhaps think about the advice given in his column. To be fair he's only regurgitating the official lines of advice but it's time someone questioned the propaganda.

He mentions Terry Pratchett, a much loved author who has early onset Alzheimers. Mr Pratchett is being very brave about it, he's donated a vast sum of money and he talks a lot of sense.

Mr Pratchett is acknowledging the devastating effect this disease has and trying to give it publicity and financial aid while he still has time.

Alzheimers affects just as many people as cancer and yet it has nowhere near the same public profile. Several years ago in Australia I saw on the news information about a drug that delays the progression of this disease, it was cheap. I wondered why we don't have it over here. I think we do now but surprise surprise it's very expensive.

Telling us that if we exercise our brains we can stave off brain disease is ridiculous, use it or lose it is the message, do crosswords, suduko, etc etc. Excuse me but isn't Mr Pratchett a very fine writer who has sold millions of books, does he not use his brain on a daily basis to do this?

Iris Murdoch, one of the great writers of our time, she had Alzheimers and continued to write as she suffered. Assumably she was exercising her brain to write.

Countless other highly intelligent people have been lost to Alzheimers, daily crosswords and brain training machines would not have made the slightest bit of difference, they were using their brains to good effect anyway.

My father died at the age of 64, he had Alzheimers. When it started he was still in full time employment as a Personnel Officer, his brain was exercised constantly by his work but this awsome & evil disease stole him piece by piece until he was a mere shell.

All this 'useful advice' is a smokescreen, the truth is there is very little help for the increasing number of carers and sufferers, research makes very slow progress and the government doesn't want to pay out for the drugs or practical help. My father died twenty two years ago and not much has changed.

Alzheimers is a ticking time bomb. Don't believe the propaganda.

Permalink | 0 comments

Hubble Bubble Van & Trouble

Source: Myriad Life
Friday 28th March 2008, 11:24am

There are those who might think I am a witch at times but some days I wish a was. I'd love to cast a spell across my van dashboard right now and make the flashing lights disappear but guess I'll have to stick to less mystical solutions!

I have had it confirmed that the lights are telling me porkies, the glow plug thingy is perfectly all right and there is absolutely nothing wrong with the brakes but now I have to go to VW for an expensive diagnostic test to determine which wires have come lose.

My regular mechanics simply can't sort this irritating problem out.

I am grateful that there is nothing wrong but all I want is a quiet life with things going smoothly for a while.

We've endured the family health problems, the revolting weather casting a damp and windy impossibility on business, please stars, try and line up sensibly in the heavens and grant us some plain sailing for a while. There that's a prayer, not hocus pocus!

Meanwhile I've been working away on the Sheringham Market blog gradually adding pictures of stalls and brief descriptions. The traders on the whole seem to be very happy that something is being done. Everyone is feeling somewhat battered by the outrageous misfortune the weather has brought.

On a more cheerful note, The Apprentice is back to entertain us. It really is such a fabricated masterpiece featuring unbelievable characters. I wonder if they do really just employ a bunch of actors. I don't care, as it is most compelling and I love Sir Alan's cutting and direct approach, "what does outstanding mean regarding your bar exams?" He grunted at the instantly dislikeable upstart barrister "that the results aren't in yet?" Or something along those lines. Classic.

As for their foray to the market to sell fish - what a load of cobblers. Arriving at market at midday - I don't think so. Loved the comment by a trader "oy, I want to make an official complaint - no vans on." For goodness sakes, this is a TV programme, they can do whatever they like. So selling at market isn't just a case of "Come and get your luverly bananas then." Golly gosh, one has to set up stall, mark things up to make a profit and everything, and my word, it takes hours!

Reality bites - loving it!!!

Permalink | 0 comments

Fordham Market Easter Monday is cancelled

Source: Myriad Life
Sunday 23rd March 2008, 6:34pm

Thankfully this is supposedly the last early Easter for sixty years. Four precious days without trade has left us cursing at this most holy of times but in truth I was much in need of a holiday.

Thanks to the white stuff...

The last six months have been a true test of will and endurance, life threatening illness, ambulances at 1am, bedside vigils, you name it, we've been through it.

Sleeping in until 10am - pure luxury. It's a strange thing to become like the rest of the human race again, days off, sleeping in, meals at proper times, before I know it I'll be soft as putty. As for spending a couple of hours in the local pub at lunchtime with the neighbours well I feel truly decadent! I am writing this after a couple of hours snoozing. I couldn't keep my eyes open for the Chelsea, Arsenal game which considering the result is just as well.

Late night TV is my favourite indulgence. Anything after 10pm I usually miss though of course I can record it's even better to watch it at the right time.

Soon all this will change and we'll be chasing our tails once more but I have to say I am enjoying this enforced rest not to mention the chocolate (well I do feel a bit sick come to mention it!) Happy Easter.

Permalink | 0 comments

There's No-one Quite Like Squeaky!

Source: Myriad Life
Thursday 20th March 2008, 4:18pm

They say laughter is akin to crying well that's how we got through today. Squeaky had us in stitches, and let's face it a good giggle is the best medicine.

With a forecast sure to inject gloom into the stoutest of hearts raising a laugh or ten at Fakenham today certainly helped the old blood pressure.

Squeaky turns up on the markets to do the summer season. He runs everywhere like a cartoon character and the Benny Hill Show theme music plays constantly in my head as I watch him. Seeing him charge around carrying an armful of stall bars I asked him what the rush was. "It's gonna rain!" He squeaked in panic.

Later when he'd set up and calmed down a bit he jigged into my stall. "These pictures" he squeaked nodding towards my batiks "very nice, but they don't exactly walk out do they?" Sore point on a rainy day with hardly any customers but I smiled indulgently.

"Lots of fancy necklaces." He said pointing to my carefully arranged stock. "You get more and more each year I notice." I refrained from pointing out that that's the idea of business. "Alright if they sell I suppose." He squeaked. I smiled again politely , I'm not exactly collecting them as museum pieces.

The markets throw up great characters every now and then and Squeaky is certainly one of them. I've never seen someone run everywhere like he does and he does a sales pitch like no other "don't be shy, come and buy" he squeaks happily over and over and over again.

Positioned next to me today he must have heard me thank the carpet man for moving pitch and landing me with Squeaky as a neighbour. "Don't worry dear," he squeaked, your canopy is down the side so you won't be able to see me."

It's not the seeing you that's the problem Squeaky, it's the strain on the eardrums that is the bother!

Seriously he affords us such amusement with his catchphrases, he's fun to have around.

Now don't be shy...

Permalink | 0 comments

Nightmare in Norfolk

Source: Myriad Life
Tuesday 18th March 2008, 8:45am

This week has become a nightmare, just when I thought things should get better they get worse. How much optimism is one person supposed to store in their tiny brain?

Trusty old van has to have a new alternator and the price quoted left me screaming at the Garage Man "NO, YOU HAVE TO DO BETTER THAN THAT!!"

I think he quoted the first price he found just to test how strong my heart is. Well Jim, it's not as strong as my Mother's so stop messing with it. More likely he was trying to test how strong my purse is, I think I left him in no doubt.

In addition to that he has to fit in the MOT sometime today which he has assured me is achievable. It better be, Sheringham Wednesday Market starts tomorrow.

Given the weather forecast for the weekend, bankruptcy beckons. Snow for goodness sakes, at EASTER.

A vote among the traders decided that there shall be no Friday market at Diss (needless to say I didn't vote for that foolish decision). So I get to miss a day trading there because they have moved the market to Thursday which clashes with my market at Fakenham. So I will be shivering at Fakenham that day by the sound of it.

I keep working on websites (www.sheringhammarket.blogspot.com and now www.fakenhammarket.blogspot.com ) in an attempt to promote our fine markets and the weather is determined to let us down.

When I started up my business I was ready for a challenge but little did I know how awsome it was to become. During the darkest of days I was always kept going by those successful business folk who recounted tales of their darkest days but kept going and were finally rewarded for their effort and endurance. Well six years later and I'm still striving with little to show for it! I'm not so sure that this effort = reward propaganda is true at all. Actually I know it isn't.

But still I keep going. Perhaps I need therapy.

Permalink | 4 comments

Another Fine Day

Source: Myriad Life
Friday 14th March 2008, 8:35pm

Spoilt with sunshine - such delirium - warmth - you'd think that while the sky is blue the livin' is easy, ha think again.

No wind, blue sky, warm sun on my face - wow!

Strange customer no.1. Bought lady's jewellery for...himself apparently. Didn't appear to be a cross dresser but as he snapped a large bangle on his wrist and purchased a large red heart pendant (for himself as far as I could make out.) Mmm well I'm very open minded about these things, it's just that it is a rare occurence. Last time was at Dereham, a very ordinary looking chap bought spangly clip on earrings for himself with the explanation he was a DJ.

Please guys, no need for explanations, we're very discreet here.

Actually I'm hugely disappointed that over the years I don't (to the best of my knowledge) appear to have served many cross dressers or transvestites for that matter. Please "don't be shy, come and buy." With apologies to Squeaky (read previous blogs please for explanation on this.

Other than that my day passed without event until the battery light came up driving home. Grrreat. I was hoping it was mimicing the brake light which is just a loose wire connection but no, according to the very nice RAC man, it's the alternator. Therefore had to load the car with makeshift, make do stall for tomorrow while kind, ever enduring partner takes van to see garage visited only a couple of days ago.

There is nothing more irritating than having to load a van then unload it again when you get home after a full day's work.

Am knackered and in a few short hours I will be up and off again. George, I need more than Faith!

Permalink | 0 comments

Treat 'Em Mean, Keep 'Em Keen

Source: Myriad Life
Thursday 13th March 2008, 6:06pm

Dear General Public, please do not apply this principle to market traders! We can't stay keen forever. T'was a lean, mean day at Fakenham today.

Either all the stars lined up the wrong way or maybe Mr Darling was not so Dahling as he bled us a little bit more.

Ouch, after a rough day's trading needing diesel just added insult to injury. 2p increase might have been delayed but it seems to go up every day anyway. 112p today at Morrisons.

C'mon I'll never get all the stock and stall on a push bike, it just isn't practical.

I can see why all the punters looked glum too but hey it's only money ha ha. Go home and have a nice relaxing glass of wine - or maybe not.

Three good things today (had to scrabble around in my head to find those, I can tell you.) We didn't get rained on - major plus. The wind was blustery but not life threatening (as it can be at Fakenham) and Squeaky is back. There was a time when we all dreaded the arrival of Squeaky as in "don't want him pitched near my stall." Kind of dread. But really he affords us so much amusement we can't help but view him with a kind of fondness.

Squeakisms - he runs everywhere like a comedy character. He used to have a huge Tweety Pie Bird sitting on his front seat for company and he used to do a merry little jig to the Birdy Song while packing away his variable stock (everything from Wagon Wheels to handbags.)

"Come and get your glasses cleaned!" In loud squeaky voice.

"Don't be shy, come and buy." Squeak, squeak.

Then he complains loudly about lack of custom. When he loses his temper he squeaks even louder. This happened a couple of years ago when a rather well-built man reckoned he'd made his glasses even dirtier. Squeaky got really mad then. Ah it was so much fun to watch.

Welcome back Squeaky - we love you really. No doubt there will be some great stories to tell about you as the summer unfolds.

So what am I doing now? Ever the optimist, I am pricing stock, well I was until I decided to do a bit of blogging.

Next week my trusty old van needs an MOT. This week it needed a new horn fitted. Funny that because it failed the MOT on that last year and it was replaced. Suspicious moi? I was driving home after trading at Sheringham when I decided to say bye bye to another trader with a sharp PARP PARP but it instead a little groan came out as if it had a sore throat.

'Oh great' I thought, flaming pheasants everywhere and me with no hooter. Luckily the dumb birds stuck to the side of the road for once and I got back safely. Without a doubt the flash of the headlamps would have done nothing to shift a pheasant from the road ahead.

Oh well, back to work...As George says "You gotta have faith."

Permalink | 0 comments

Shouting about Sheringham Market

Source: Myriad Life
Tuesday 11th March 2008, 6:04pm

The time has come to stop being shrinking violets, the traders of Sheringham Market want to tell everyone how great it is to shop there

Here is a picture of the Myriad Life stall at Strumpshaw Steam Rally, more about that below, after a news item re Sheringham!

Sheringham Market has so much to offer and yet it seems to be left off most websites and leaflets promoting Sheringham. Well us traders have had enough of being ignored and want to promote our market. This week I have set up a Sheringham Market Blog to tell the world about the traders there, what they sell and to show pictures of their stalls. Check out http://sheringhammarket.blogspot.com to find out more. Bear in mind it is a work in progress but any comments or suggestions will be welcomed. A similar site for Fakenham will follow suit.

Sheringham's Wednesday Market begins 19th March. Don't be shy, come and buy!!

This week the EDP did a really nice piece on Diss which included a big picture of the market with the Myriad Life Jewellery stall right at the far end. Well it's the thought that counts.

Now the weather is getting better ha ha, my thoughts are turning to an expansion in stock. I spend many a long hour ruminating on how to present my lovely jewels. I've been a bit useless so far this year, I've only booked one show so need to get a move on and book more. Stradsett in May is booked, this is the Stradsett Park Vintage Rally and takes place 4/5th May - the first bank holiday. It's well worth a visit if you love old tractors, classic cars etc.

The next one is the Strumpshaw Steam Rally which is a lovely event at the end of May bank holiday, it runs Sat/Sun/Mon. I particularly enjoy this one (despite the fact it usually rains) because it is like stepping back in time. Folks dress up to drive their vintage steam engines around an idyllic meadow with sprawling great trees. They have a super old funfair, sideshows and of course lots of great trade stalls including the Myriad Life stall. If you love steam engines and old time memorabilia this is the show for you. I will let you know as more crop up. I must get into gear...

Permalink | 0 comments

A Mumism!

Source: Myriad Life
Friday 7th March 2008, 9:47pm

We went to see The Bank Job the other day, us two and the Tough Ol' Thing. After much ponderance over what to view we kicked The Bucket List and opted for the heist film..

There was I, worried that The Bank Job might be a bit on the violent side so we read the write up carefully, 'scenes of a sexual nature,' it said.

"I don't like too much violence" says the Tough Ol' Thing "but sex is all right, at least that's people loving each other." What is one to say!

Needless to say we all enjoyed it - great film - well we thought so. And Jason Statham has done his time on the markets or as a street trader at least, so there is a link here .

Back to the markets (link). This is my week so far. Thursday, ticked over but favourite moment of the day goes to the man who strode in and said "just here to look at your weights, wanted to see what make they are." "Don't mind me sir, you carry on." It's not like I'm here to sell me Jewellies after all.

The traders liked my poster (who wouldn't? Ego), so we're going to get that sorted and planted in a variety of appropriate places.

The bent double man from Binham visited gave a brief (but characteristically cheerful) summing up of the weather, as if I wasn't aware of it. The Antiquarian Bookman (antique by name, antique by nature) paid his usual visit to tell me about his week.

Today started with showers and then completely defeated the forecast by being sunny and gorgeous, the top of my head was burning as I had a chat with my neighbour the Flower Lady. We discussed Religion - no small talk round our way.

I attempted to sort out the Hotdog Man's mobile phone for him and failed. Predictive text problems - made a change because I usually have predictive man problems.

And tomorrow we have harsh winds forecast yet again. So once again I'll be chewing on my locks and struggling to keep the dummies upright (no I'm not talking about the customers.)

Myriad Life for flyaway jewels, pashminas and batiks - get them quick before they get spun away from the stall in the wind and end up treating the Dutch to some lovely stylish items for free!

Permalink | 0 comments

Myriad Marketing

Source: Myriad Life
Wednesday 5th March 2008, 6:06pm

There is more to being a market trader than meets the eye! I've taken it upon myself to start promoting our fine Norfolk markets. Well the ones Myriad Life visits anway..

But hopefully my campaign will filter through to other markets too. The web has been my initial port of call however I am aware that many people still do not own computers or don't use them effectively.

Having said that I came across a great new website called www.enjoynorthnorfolk.com and am looking at advertising with them. Anyone who wants to promote their business in this area should take a look. They are a new, young and enthusiastic company who aren't charging an arm and a leg to advertise and are very friendly to deal with.

Next up I've been designing posters to hang in the local tourist offices with leaflets to follow shortly. Radio advertising is a consideration but I will need a bit of financial imput from other traders as I guess it won't be cheap.

I already hand out colourful postcards to all my customers advertising Myriad Life but the time has come to fight for our markets collectively. We need people to understand what shopping at markets is all about and encourage younger folk to check us out too.

If anyone has any good 'marketing' ideas I'd love to hear from them. I've worked in advertising before but local knowledge is always good and although obviously I live in Norfolk I'm not always aware of what is going on in the towns my stall visits due to lack of time. So if anyone in Fakenham, Diss or Sheringham has a space for one of our posters please let me know.

Permalink | 0 comments

An Extreme Sport

Source: Myriad Life
Sunday 2nd March 2008, 2:53pm

Market trading this week was something of an extreme sport. My first day calm and sunny, the second ended in a downpour which left me soaked and the third found me battling gusty winds

I woke up this morning feeling like I'd done a few rounds with Mike Tyson and he'd won. One thing we never get bored with in this country is the weather. The weather provides the market trader with some severe psychological and physical testing on a regular basis.

It's impossible not to talk about it. Yesterday at Sheringham I had to leave the canopy off or I'd have ended up in Cromer. As it was, every time I laid out the jewellery it shifted inches at a time across the tables. Forget putting out scarves, if I'd wanted to go kite flying I'd have brought one.

I did manage to clip up a few batiks and miraculously my display dummies managed to stay put (with three large metal clips attached to each of their bottoms), they did rock back a forth a bit but I marvelled at their determined stance in the face of 40mph gusts.

If only I'd clipped back my hair, I spent most of the day with it in my eyes or in my mouth. A pony tail however would have exposed my ears to the elements and they were frozen enough. I don't do well with hats, they invariably end up giving me a headache and besides, the scary hair effect when I finally remove the hat to drive home leaves even the seagulls screeching with fear!

Mother's day brought a few customers determined to treat the lady who'd brought them into the world. One man described the wood bracelet his partner bought for her mother as resembling a fence! I've heard some odd comments on my stall over the past few years but that once was a first.

Meanwhile the EDP printed an article on the demise of Dereham market. Myriad Life used to have a pitch at Dereham market. I stuck it out for just over a year before I realised that Dereham didn't really want me and I didn't really want Dereham. The council in their wisdom banished the market to a car park which never worked. Markets ideally should be in the centre of market towns where they belong.

However, mis-information was given in that there are 23 traders on a Friday, not 7 as reported (they belong to the Tuesday market.) I couldn't help but feel very cross about the council suddenly waking up and noticing their 52k pa income from the market had severedly dwindled. All those years of raking in the dough but no one thinking to spend it on future promotion of the market or even to use a few quid to put signage up to show visitors where and when it is.

I once asked the market inspector what promotional activity they would do for the market, it turned out to be a 'Fun Day' involving a clown handing out balloons on the market site. Pointless and somewhat insulting.

Never mind, I got out while the going was good and fled to Diss where they have a more understanding council as far as the market goes. I do feel for the guys still at Dereham but I guess it's up to them to fight for their businesses.

Permalink | 0 comments