Posted in April 2007

TV Telephone Quizes - Gamble and be Swindled

Source: Kim Mutton
Tuesday 24th April 2007, 2:32pm

It didn't take a rocket surgeon to work out the con here.

Gambling with your phone bill

Why has it taken so long for this issue to be highlighted? Panorama did a half hour on this - no real surprises - there's one if not hundreds born every minute.

Just have to ask what's with the really irritating camera work to give the illusion of "investigative" reporting - hold the bloomin camera still - all the interviews were with consent.

Did the Muppets that are grumbling about the hundreds of pounds spent aimlessly phoning TV quizes really not cotton on to the fact that there was zip all chance of getting through? The questions are too easy to believe yet the way the late night programmes run is that you are made to think that you're the only person with the answer. Prolonged silent spells with no background phone sounds, however if you were to call you get a cheerie message saying that you're unsuccessfull, try again soon and thanks for you dosh and the glamourous girly becons you with sparkly eyes and wet glossed lips.

To cap it all a lanky tool from Ofcom chips in with his belief that they are fair and he would encourage folk to ring the numbers.

Surely this is gambling and programmesthat use these quizes as nice little earners should be regulated and taxed accordingly.

I checked this gambling guide and found no reference to tv phone cons but i have contacted them to request inclusion.

In the meantime if you want to have your say phone 0907 only joking 020 7981 3040 and ask to speak to the jerk featured on TV Panorama last night

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Cliff, Choppers, Cresta and MP3 Players

Source: Kim Mutton
Monday 16th April 2007, 11:58am

I like Tall Speakers, I like small speakers...

Dig that Music I'm Wired For Sound

My last post about the wonderful knicker-dropping Hai Karate Aftershave I began to reminisce about how some things have change during my short time.

On Freshly Squeezed (Chanel 4, 7am) they showed the video of Cliff Richard flailing around on rollerskate singing "wired for sound" and wearing monster headphones attached to a walkman the size of a school satchel (remeber satchels?).

Now I see tell tale white leads leading to various Brands of MP3 Players - some the size of credit cards.

Another thing that was "big in its day" was the Chopper Bike from Raleigh. I yearned for one and entered loads of competitions with the hope of winning the top prize of a five speed Chopper. the best I did was runner up for which I got a case of Stawberry Cresta - its Frothy Man.

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Hai Karate: Classic men's fragrance from yesteryear

Source: Kim Mutton
Friday 13th April 2007, 4:20pm

be careful how you use it.

Hai Karate Aftershave

Pfizer (famous for Viagra) developed Hai Karate. This Vintage Commerical shows a girl coming at him from all angles and he had to karate chop her away - oddly turning to camera at one point to show his similarity to Woody Allen.

Hai Karate after shave lotion came with 'self-defense' instructions to help you fight off the hordes of horny women attracted by the scent.

"Don't dare use Hai Karate without memoriing this: These instructions will help you to defend yourself from women in case you apply an over dose of Hai Karate
It then gives three simple steps to 'remove' the offending women.

I'm pretty sure any smellies released today which advocated the hitting of women or men wouldn't get very far! Although a little bird told me Calvin Klien is considering releasing CK Slap-Per the fragrance for chicks that don't have to try too hard.

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Credit Cards - Small and Plastic but not munchtastic.

Source: Kim Mutton
Thursday 12th April 2007, 5:06pm

Keep on your toes - the banks are well rehearsed at running us round in circles.

Hats off to RBS Coutts and their new credit card charges

Last month I trawled the Money Saving Expert site to see what folk were saying about current deals on credit cards. We are alway hearing that we should change mortgage provider and shop around for intro offers with credit cards.

I finally opted for the Mint Credit Card - it seemed to get the thumbs up from lots of posts on various forums so I applied online and it arrived within the week. Cool balance transfer offer but I felt a bit of a plum when I rang to complain my card had a corner missing!

Now the rascals have pulled a nifty trick when you use the card to buy gift vouchers (I myself am particualary fond of giving these as it appears that you have actually given the gift some thought). These transactions are now to be treated in the same extortionate way that cash withdrawals are - a whopping 24.9% immediate interest.

Slippery devils - it must be the Scottish in them. Tartan bladder hooting meanies.

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I read the news today Oh Boy!

Source: Kim Mutton
Tuesday 10th April 2007, 10:24am

Fifteen sailors captured for straying into Iranian waters, fourteen men, one woman.

Doesn't take a genius to work out who was reading the map.

Headline: Pasty Muncher, Faye sells story for six figure sum.

Well there seems to be some value in her spilling the beans...

Faye gave Ahmadinejad a bloody nose in this exchange:

Ahmadinejad: How is your daughter?
Faye: I don’t know, Mr President, I haven’t seen her for 13 days – remember?

“Islamic fanatic” Ahmadinejad ”stutters”.

Ahmadinejad: Oh yes. But haven’t you been allowed a phone to call her?
Faye: No, I most certainly have not.

Ahmadinejad is “red-faced”.

Ahmadinejad: Er, well, good luck in your life and your future.

Says Faye: He looked really embarrassed and didn’t know what to do.

Headscarftastic.

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Mark the day

Source: Kim Mutton
Wednesday 4th April 2007, 2:48pm

As Letter's blog says, the last year has gone so fast

It is a year to the day that I began my current position.

I had been enticed to leave the black market economy of self employment and my only knowledge of the business I was entering was from the short interview - they seemed like a nice group of chaps and if they had the humour to hire me it would be churlish to have declined their offer.

When I arrived I was presented with a selection of boxes and told to assemble my own desk and chair.

It was then that the real fun started - I was presented with a computer.

"What do you want me to do with that"? I exclaimed.

"Work" was the reply.

There was no mention of these machines previously but I thought "just blagg it for a while, you'll soon pick a few things"

Well a year later I can create simple speadsheets, write and save basic word processing documents, open and read email but not too good at replying, and lo browse the World Wide Weberooney.

If any of the fellas who made the decision to take me on are reading this - cheers chaps - here's to the next year - lets hope it's a good one without any tears.

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