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Home > Blogs > Norfolk Single Dad > Posted in August 2007 Norfolk Single DadPosted in August 2007A slice of English life in all its glory, through the eyes of a 39 year-old single dad and his amazing 4 year-old son.... Ups! And Downs.....
Source: Eddie2sox Been a funny old day today. Glad it's over to be honest, before anything else happens! Good stuff:
Picked Sam up at 8, Little Miss Lemon from the Woolpack at ten past, headed to Peterborough to try and get hold of LML's passport. Returned passport-less, BUT with an appointment tomorrow with the right people - looks promising!
Had a fun day with Sam.
Got me mop of gyppo hair cut off.
Won some crisps! Remember a while ago we enjoyed the Salt & Vinegar World Cup? Yesterday got a vague email looking for Norfolk Single Dad, mentioning S&V crisps - I replied asking if I was in trouble (assumed a "losing" brand had got a cob on). Well today this email arrived: HiYour not trouble at all far from it I want to thank you, plus I would I also want to send you some of our new hot and spicy crisps too, Some Thanks again Kind regards Darren Stanley Bobby Dazzler!
Not So Good Stuff:
Got turned down for a job with the Red Cross.
Sam's mum going off on one about nothing.
Immersion broke again! To report this post follow the permalink aboveGuess Who's Feeling Positive?
Source: Eddie2sox Surprise surprise it's me! Right, no idea why I should feel good about the future, but I'm not knocking it.
Went to see the doc today, my blood pressure is hunky-dory and he signed me up for the discounted gym scheme that runs in King's Lynn. Why? Well, since I have been limiting my drinking to two days a week (usually) my alcohol counsellor advised to maybe treat myself on non-drinking days, with some item of food I really like. So, while the alcohol consumption has decreased rapidly, I am actually putting weight on, which is something of a contradictory situation. Hence I will be walking up to Lynnsport this morning to sign my life/lard away.
On the subject of alcohol counselling, my counsellor is back from his enforced leave, but on holiday this week. So next week I will be getting back in touch with him as well.
Right now I'm off up to clean The Woolpack, from there into town for a hair cut, via the sports centre.
Positivity, what a peculiar feeling.
p.s. the photo's just a random "nice" one, from our trip to Oxburgh Hall.... To report this post follow the permalink aboveCrap Parking League XXII - Sponsored By Letty!
Source: Eddie2sox Why do people not even try to get in the lines? Corsa makes joint top spot! Letty, I hope you take this as a joke, surely when you look at these attempts at parking you must realise that you are actually BLOODY BRILLIANT!
Table:
New Shape Mini.....4 Vauxhall Corsa.....4 Honda Civic.....2 VW Golf.....2 VW Bora.....1.5 Vauxhall Vectra.....1.5 Ford Escort.....1.5 Vauxhall Combo van.....1 Peugeot 206.....1 Mystery Rover.....1 Huge Green American Monstrosity.....1 Ford Focus.....1 Original Mini.....1 Ford Ka.....1 Jaguar XJS.....1
Send me any pics of bad parking you collect to trix68@hotmail.co.uk
And why not peruse the Net's best bad parking website at: http://www.crap-parking.co.uk/index.php?mode=home To report this post follow the permalink aboveTwo Good Days On The Bounce!
Source: Eddie2sox Yesterday was ace, today was even better, so UP YOURS, DREAMS! Ha, one little stupid dream can't derail me!
Yesterday I was working on a toy stall at the Norton Hill Light Railway. We made some cash, sold most of the toys, everyone's a winner. Best of all who wandered up but our very own Frustrated Businessman! Paul is a top bloke, as you probably know, and was as excited about the tiny train as Sam and me had been the day before - well, who wouldn't be? We had a really good chat for 10/15 minutes until he was liberated by Mrs Businessman, hope we can meet up - preferably along with the elusive Letster - SOON! Next "chariddy" outing? Next week at the Norfolk Police Gala at the Norfolk Showground!
Picked Sam up today at 9, we both went back to finish the cleaning at The Woolpack (WHO have they had in since I left, it was nowhere near up to my standards!). Off early to the banger racing for a change, meaning:
1. We could park in the Arena car park, instead of three-quarters of a mile away on a grass verge; 2. We got seats in the grandstand, meaning a better view for Sam and much less wear-and-tear on Daddy's shoulders; 3. We didn't have to queue in the cafe for our lovely junk food dinner; 4. We were in our seats ready, when the Battle of Britain Memorial Flight made an unexpected flyover of the Arena, lovely!
The racing was excellent, including the V8 stock car World Championship - featuring drivers from as far away as New Zealand! The highlights though were the Demolition Derby at the end and best of all the Caravan Race! They always allow a driver called Ady Broom to use his banger car to wreak havoc (well, EXTRA havoc) on the caravans, and he didn't let us down. The first caravan to shed its skin, there was Ady smashing straight through it, sending matchstick caravan pieces in all directions. Sadly a HUGE piece was draped all over the front of his car.....but he kept going, how on earth could he see where he was going? Fantastic and exhilerating entertainment.
Sam was out like a light at bedtime, but not before this little conversation, just as his eyes were getting heavy:
"Daddy, I love you." "I love you too Sam." "Do you know how much I love you?" "How much?" "One hundred and twenty MILLION." To report this post follow the permalink aboveBad Start To A Bank Holiday!
Source: Eddie2sox Got to get better surely.... What a crappy way to start the Holiday Monday, with another bad, bad dream. The ones in which I die are easier to deal with, they're just scary and fade quickyl when I wake up. Today's was a proper emotional nightmare, and is still with me, GO AWAY!
It was set when me and Sam's mum split up, in a different place, different circumstances though, but all the feelings were the same - just as terrible.
It ended when I woke up crying, how pathetic! In the dream Sam had found me at the top of some stairs in a house, reached his finger onto my face and said "Daddy, you're crying", then he sat on my lap and we both cried a lot onto each other's shoulders. Not good.
So it seems that even if you consciously know you've moved on from bad stuff in your life, your subconscious stores the desperate feelings up for use at a later date. Not sure why "now" was the time I had to go through this, but hey, it's done, it's out of the way, and me and Sam are together from 9 this morning for 33 hours!
Meantime I am off to clean The Woolpack! To report this post follow the permalink aboveSpiderpig, Scarecrows & Steam On A Small Scale!
Source: Eddie2sox Our Saturday turned out even BETTER than I thought it would, starting at home with Homer, progressing into the Norfolk countryside, and all on a budget, lovely! Well, for a start, I think I fecked up the job interview! I know I can do these jobs stood on my head with my eyes closed, but I am pants in interviews. Ho hum. Still not heard either way, so hope lives on. That was the bad stuff. The good stuff is that the weekend has so far been even better than anticipated. Friday afternoon was quiet and indoor due to the weather (so Old Bob - I thought to myself, when is this glorious sun you PROMISED me coming?). Fun though, lots of activity at Bob’s Garage, but the biggest story was that the Baddies have teamed up with the Pirates on their ship, and are planning to take over the castle. So as well as the usual crew, the pirate ship anchored for the night with Metalpants, Snakeboy, Minotaur, Pirate Pickles (what is Farmer Pickles thinking of?), Red Power Ranger (again, why?) and two other baddies aboard. Bath was fun, and then me and Sam shared a chicken curry, made from the chicken left from last week’s roast. It was LOVELY, and we both scoffed it down in record time. Much sniggering about how Daddy’s bed in the morning might sound like a brass band tuning up. 4 years old but he’s got the hang of English toilet humour, good lad! After stories about Schnitzel von Krum and Charlie & Lola, Sam sparked out. Night night son. Saturday dawned at 5-ish, when Sam joined his Daddy for a snooze. We had a lovely morning playing Bob’s garage/fire station/hospital (incidentally, if Britain can introduce establishments with such a wide range of capabilities we are SORTED, ask Bob The Builder how it’s done), watching some telly, entering competitions, baking Spiderman cakes, and doing Youtube. We watched several vids, but the two that we enjoyed the most were the Family Guy “last to be sick” competition, and best of all SPIDERPIG! We watched the clip over and over, Sam was wetting himself laughing which made me laugh too, for a long time. If you’ve not seen the clip, look http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=_2uZkae8ra8 We tried to recreate the scene, with me holding Sam on the ceiling, but it didn’t last long once Sam really got into character. Now, please don’t criticise unless you’ve seen your own 4 year old laughing hysterically every time Homer Simpson sings “No he can’t, he’s a pig”, believe me it is unforgettable.And THEN we went out! Filled up with petrol, Sam wanted to see what happens so he was “tank-side” as we pumped a big £14 of unleaded into Lightning, then “shop-side” to pick what crisps he would like. We VERY rarely eat crisps, but hey, now and then is fine. Sam was pretty under whelmed with what was previously a mysterious place for him, i.e. the petrol station shop. And then we headed off to the real business. We laugh about the fact that we ALWAYS seem to make at least one wrong turning whenever we go somewhere, and that it’s ALWAYS raining. But guess what? NOT TODAY!
First stop was the Wolferton Scarecrow Festival. This is a uniquely English affair, in which every single house in the village of Wolferton makes a scarecrow or two and displays them in their garden, on the side of the road, in the churchyard etc. The village roads are closed to traffic for the duration of the festival meaning you and your children can wander around in complete safety. The purpose of the festival is to raise money for chosen charities, but donations are not compulsory making this a cheap but lovely place to visit. As it happened, we took a bag full of 20p coins for Sam to put in various charity buckets along the way. There are also various sideshows and stalls, all in the “very cheap” price range, and all evoking a very traditional English Village Fete atmosphere, lovely! If you don’t want to, or can’t, walk all the way round, Norfolk Green donate a bus to the festival to drive constantly at about 5 mph round the trail. We enjoyed our picnic before we set off in the expertly marshalled car park, and then we were off (via a Portaloo which greatly amused Sam). The scarecrows were so inventive, Sam loved it! There was a window cleaner dangling from an upstairs window above a fallen ladder, Elvis Presley, Freddie Flintoff in a boat surrounded by empty beer cans, a dog in a hammock, nuns, Harry Potter, Santa, Mr & Mrs Dracula, SPIDERPIG!, and LOADS more. We will DEFINITELY be going back next year. And then we shouted “All Aboard” (no, really, we did shout it), and drove up to the Norton Hill Light Railway in Snettisham. This is a private railway that is only open over three Bank Holiday weekends each year, with all proceeds again going to local charities. It costs a whopping £1 to enter, and rides on the train are £1.50 per trip. There’s not much else there apart from some charity stalls, a hand-cranked children’s roundabout (gotta feel sorry for the Army Cadet doing the winding!), a bowls stall and a hook-a-duck, but that’s not the point. We love mini-railways, and this was a rare chance to add another to the list. If previous years are a standard, each of the charities present stands to end up £2000 better off by the end of the weekend, which is pretty damn good. Sam “won” on the stalls (hey, he still thinks it’s wonderful, let him enjoy the innocence of it) and caused major consternation on the nine man morris bowling by wellying one ball straight backwards through his legs! The train ride is one kilometre long, including a tunnel, a bridge and a viaduct, and it’s lovely to hear the mini engines huffing and puffing on the way. Sam really enjoyed the ride, so much so that we went on it twice! In fact, we were both so taken by the whole thing that we are now in the planning stage of building our own mini railway at home, for his Thomas and Percy trains to chuff along! If you use the loo there though, hold your nose when you go in, it’s a little ripe! I’ll be manning one of the charity stalls today, come and say hello if you visit. So, Scarecrow Festival, followed by Norton Hill Light Railway. Brilliant day’s fun, total cost maybe, hmmm £20, including Sam’s goes on stalls, in raffles etc, can’t be bad. Who says there is nothing to do in Norfolk? You must be blind, dig a bit deeper! Back at home we were rushing again, Sam scoffed some spaghetti bolognaise, we didn’t have time for a bath, but we had a wonderful time together. Enduring memory? “Spiderpig, Spiderpig, does whatever a Spiderpig does, can he swing from a web, no he can't he's a pig.....” To report this post follow the permalink aboveWeekend Ahoy!
Source: Eddie2sox Busy weekend ahead for the 2-Soxes..... For a start I have a job interview this afternoon at half past two, immediately after I am picking Sam up. We will be playing "Bob's garage/fire station" all afternoon and also making some Spiderman Cakes! Tea today is chicken curry, as Sam told me "I LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE chicken curry Daddy, it's my favourite". Amazing. We will also be making a tent out of Sam's duvet and the broom.
Tomorrow the plan is to have a laid back morning of playing, food and Saturday morning telly. In the afternoon we are heading to Snettisham to the Norton Hill Light Railway charity day. This little railway only runs 3 weekends a year and after operating costs they give all the money to local causes. It's a tiny railway but looks very scenic, and Sam will love it. We're also donating some of our Spiderman cakes to be sold, come on down, they're luvverley!
Sunday will be a lazy morning for Daddy, then in the afternoon I am manning my voluntary group's stand at the Norton Hill Railway. Come along to point and laugh at me, but if you do it will cost £1 for my group! It's open from 2 til 5 pm. Blatant advertising I know, but once in a while doesn't hurt does it? (Did I mention that we will also have a stand at next Sunday's Police Gala at the Royal Norfolk Showground?).
Monday is going to be lovely, Sam and me are going to the Bank Holiday banger racing again, YAY! This time there is a caravan destruction derby as the finale, along with lots of noisy races from one o'clock. We'll be getting there about 12:15 though, to secure our places in the grandstand - better views, more room to eat (!), Daddy's shoulders don't get worn out! If you've not tried the banger racing before give it a go, it's fun. Fantastically, Sam's mummy has agreed that Sam can sleep over and go back at 6 on Tuesday night (cheers, bird). So I am now looking into what we're doing on the Tuesday.
Today I received some t-shirts I ordered for Sam from a high quality manufacturer, thankfully I was offered an 80% discount, meaning Sam now has three more brilliant t-shirts for the price of three Woolies/Tesco shirts. Yes I am tight!
This weekend's gonna be great! To report this post follow the permalink aboveGrumpy Old Men
Source: Eddie2sox Made a return to the Grumpy Old Men club tonight, first time since the back end of June. Spoke to Sam to say night night as soon as I got there, he was in fine form and had a great plan! We should get a tent! Yeah, then we can play soldiers! Bless the imaginative monkey!
I sidestepped a row with Sam's mummy too, about time with Sam, nice footwork by me I reckon. But that's a rant for another occasion. I like the fact we can have blatant disagreements now, we couldn't when we were together. Tonight we reached the point where either could have said another word, whatever the word, e.g. "cheese" or "hammock" and it would have kicked off, but we didn't. How terribly grown up!
So, the Grumpy Old Men. Usual suspects were there, Old Bob, Gypsy Rose McPhee, Gerry The Genial Jock, and Wally. Handshakes all round for my re-appearance, and god have I missed some stuff. Hot topic of conversation was Flog It, the telly programme, apparently every bugger in the pub was on it! The pub was so quiet though, shocking. Leeds Ady came in to boost the numbers, and we had a laugh about my altercation with Norfolk Constabulary! "Defending the pub single handed" it has been described as! We moaned about the fact that people keep nicking my ideas for books, my "Barry Potter, boy wizard" idea never got a look in ten years ago, my "Famous Three" kid detective books were overlooked too. As was my epic "Peace And War", and my religion/erotica masterpice The Booble. Someone came up with some tat and called it The Bible and my idea was Robert Maxwell (dead in the water). Charlie was performging card tricks so I bewildered everyone with my bank robber trick (it's the way I tell em), then Stewart gave me yet another puzzle to work out. A punctuation puzzle! See bottom of blog.
I left after a pleasant hour, and am now sat typing this blog, watching bats flying back and forth in front of my window, FANTASTIC!
Stewart's puzzle. Punctuate this:
Eddie where Letty had had had had had had
It does make sense when you know the answer!
To report this post follow the permalink above Crap Parking League XXI
Source: Eddie2sox A desperate abandonment! D Minus, See Me Later! New ruletime. It's my competition and I can change the rules when I want! Any parking abomination that nullifies FOUR parking spaces from simultaneous use will score 1.5 points instead of the usual 1. This one I really enjoyed, the jaunty angle of the wheels just adds to the magic. A well-earned one and a half, well done!
Table:
New Shape Mini.....4 Vauxhall Corsa.....3 Honda Civic.....2 VW Golf.....2 VW Bora.....1.5 Vauxhall Vectra.....1.5 Ford Escort.....1.5 Vauxhall Combo van.....1 Peugeot 206.....1 Mystery Rover.....1 Huge Green American Monstrosity.....1 Ford Focus.....1 Original Mini.....1 Ford Ka.....1 Jaguar XJS.....1
Send me any pics of bad parking you collect to trix68@hotmail.co.uk
And why not peruse the Net's best bad parking website at: http://www.crap-parking.co.uk/index.php?mode=home To report this post follow the permalink aboveIs It Raining? Yes! Right Let's Go To Sheringham!
Source: Eddie2sox Another day on the Sam and Daddy Roadshow where rain definitely did NOT stop play.... On Tuesday afternoon we braved the midweek A17 and drove up to Sleaford to see Sam’s Nana and Grandad as a kind of surprise visit - but also to deliver Nana’s birthday cards and present. As per, Sam slept for an hour which was just as well because we were stationary on the Sleaford bypass for 45 minutes while an accident was sorted out and the air ambulance loaded up and departed. We had a lot of fun at Sleaford despite not getting outside too much. Nana LOVED the card that Sam had written in. Grandad revealed that he has actually been out driving in his car earlier in the day, first time in probably 17/18 months, fantastic news. Sam must be growing, as the apple tree he has previously run under safely this time was slightly too low for him and he kept cracking his head on the hanging apples - which amused him no end. Just as we were leaving, Nana was holding their dog to see us out, and as I gave her a hug the dog STUCK IT’S SLOBBERY TONGUE INTO MY MOUTH. Bleurgh, man, did I feel sick! **Note - I was going to include a line saying something like “Mind you, it’s not the first time a dog’s had her tongue in my mouth” but I think I’ll sidestep that one** On Wednesday morning Sam woke up after a bad dream and ended up in with me at 4.22, just two minutes earlier than the other day. He kept on dreaming too, at one point yelling “I got enough guitar already!” We hadn’t really had a plan of what to do on Tuesday night, but were determined to go out “somewhere”. Chatting to Sam’s mummy after she had said goodnight to him on the phone I said that we’d probably be going out whatever the weather, as it keeps people away from where we go - and Sam’s mummy said “Yes, I’ve heard that about you two from Sam”. Our reputation as weather-hardened fun-seekers proceeds us! We surfed the Interweb and decided to go find a train somewhere. This was quickly narrowed down to either Bure Valley or North Norfolk (aka Poppy Line) and the Poppy Line won as we could have chips on the seafront at Sheringham. Time to go and we loaded the car with BIG coats, spare dry socks, wellies and in particular a KLFM sticker kindly sent to us by the lovely Cheryl (next time the Black Jet is out and about check them out, Cheryl = Brum Brum!). We allowed over an hour to make a 40 minute drive to Holt to board the 11:15 steam train, but a Sunday driver out 4 days early meant we arrived with just 4 or 5 minutes to spare. And it was lashing down with rain, never mind eh? I kept an eye out for the Frustrated Businessman’s crowd, but it turns out they were one train ahead of us. Tickets bought, toilets visited, all aboard, and off we rattled. It’s so nice being pulled along by a steam engine, you can almost feel every chuff (that sounds like a euphemism, sorry) and the clouds of steam drifting past the windows are very atmospheric. We took silly photos all the way to Sheringham, so-called “views” out of the window (when all they showed were raindrops clustered on the glass), pics of each other hiding under Sam’s hat, etc, and then we pulled into Sheringham. The weather had deteriorated! Our objectives were: 1. Fish and chips for dinner - leftover chips to be thrown at, errr I mean “to”, seagulls. 2. Find fridge magnet for Sam’s collection. 3. Go and see “house-sized waves” (a friend of ours is on holiday near Cromer at the moment and had texted us that the waves were as big as houses). 4. Blow a pound or two in an amusements arcade. First stop, chip shop, and we bottled it and sat inside to eat. Sam pinched half Daddy’s fish (that was Daddy’s plan Hee Hee, fish is good for him) and when we’d finished we smuggled a pile of uneaten chips into our bag and out of the door. We battled our way into the howling gale towards the seafront - the tide was right in and there was nobody else near the sea…….so we ambled down a slipway to feed the gulls and feel the spray from the crashing (yes, house-sized) waves which were breaking on the rocks 5 metres below us. The chip-chucking wasn’t too successful, as hard as we threw them towards the sea, the wind was grabbing them and blowing them back over our heads. Sam absolutely loved watching the huge waves (so did I of course), and when we walked round a corner the strong wind became even more powerful. At that point we decided to retreat up to the main street. Got some good pics of Sam in front of huge approaching waves. It has to be said that the amusements at Sheringham are inferior to those at Hunstanton, but then again it’s a smaller resort. Still, we changed £2 into 2p coins and had fun for ages.In the end Sam decided to cut his losses and told me he wanted to “take these pennies home and put them in my pig, Daddy”. Very sensible son. Sam then found a suitable fridge magnet, and we headed back onto the train. Not the end of the fun though - back at Holt station Sam was amazed by the model railway layout there. It is pretty good as far as I can tell, but Sam thought it was the best thing he’d ever seen. We spent another 20 minutes watching various trains chugging round the tracks, spotting different details on the layout etc, before finally braving the rain again, diving into the car, and making for home. As usual the 6 o’clock return time hit home, who’d have thought that going out at 10 you’d be struggling to make it for 6? Never mind, we rushed through tea and bathtime, had a quick playtime, then back to mummy’s. Another brilliant day, where rain did NOT stop play! To report this post follow the permalink aboveI Have A Cyber-Stalker!
Source: Eddie2sox I've finally made it, someone is stalking me in cyberspace! A few days ago someone called "Amanda Inglis" left a rather snotty reply to one of my blogs here.
Today someone on a different website published that "EDDIE2SOX" has been registered as a term of abuse HERE
Fantastic, I've finally made it!
So:
1. Anyone know who Amanda Inglis is? Including the IMM Admin, there was such a person with an account here, the comment seems to have been removed "for some reason" lol. IMM, if that account was London/Surrey based I know who it is.... 2. Can anyone else here boast their own Urban Dictionary entry? Yeee ha! To report this post follow the permalink aboveClaire Nasir, Brum Brum!
Source: Eddie2sox Just started this blog and noticed GMTV weathergirl Claire Nasir looking lovely on the telly...... Anyway, that is nothing at all to do with anything else. Last night I again had a Big Brother dream, I was again a housemate and only two weeks from the end of the show. The house was in Peterborough. Rolf Harris delivered some kind of kestrel for me to attract by whizzing a dead fish round and round on a string, which the bird ate in one go. There was also some kind of weird water-stream bagatelle machine delivered. And I planned to become the first "live" escapee by legging it off down the river bank into Peterborough town centre. Crackers!
However, it wasn't scary, which is a novelty at the moment. Got eaten by a polar bear the other night. Also cornered and stabbed in Sainsburys car park near King's Lynn bus station. Compared to these, splashing around in the BB pool is much better.
So yesterday I went to Hunstanton to have a walk along the cliffs, and it was wet, windy and wild. Lovely! Went mad and had some MORE chips out of the paper for dinner, two pints and a read of the paper in the rather modern but surprisingly enjoyable Marine Bar (full review soon I hope!), then home into the sanctuary and warmth of our little flat.
Today I'm picking Sam up at 1230 and we're heading off to see his Nana and Grandad this afternoon. Tomorrow Sam has a dentist's appointment so there may be trouble ahead......Sam's mummy is terrified of dentists and avoids them for years at a time, I don' mind them. Has anyone got any tips for keep children calm/calming them down where the dentist is concerned?
Thursday I have voluntary 10 til 2, Friday another job interview then picking Sam up. Saturday we're off to Norton Hill Light Railway at Snettisham, come on down, it should be fun. Train rides are only £1.50, there are other stalls there too. And on Sunday, if you visit, you'll find ME behind the stall of my voluntary group, see you there!
But first......the housework....... To report this post follow the permalink aboveCrap Parking League XX
Source: Eddie2sox Even expensive motors get abandoned with little or no effort sometimes! And this is a good example. Seems like the car's too big for the driver to handle, hance leaving it 5 feet shy of fitting in the parking space. Use some of your money to take driving lessons!
Table:
New Shape Mini.....4 Vauxhall Corsa.....3 Honda Civic.....2 VW Golf.....2 VW Bora.....1.5 Vauxhall Vectra.....1.5 Vauxhall Combo van.....1 Peugeot 206.....1 Mystery Rover.....1 Huge Green American Monstrosity.....1 Ford Focus.....1 Original Mini.....1 Ford Ka.....1 Jaguar XJS.....1
Send me any pics of bad parking you collect to trix68@hotmail.co.uk
And why not peruse the Net's best bad parking website at: http://www.crap-parking.co.uk/index.php?mode=home To report this post follow the permalink aboveGood Friday
Source: Eddie2sox Not the religious mumbo-jumbo version, just that me and Sam had a good Friday together I picked Sam up from the swimming pool where he's been having lessons for the last two weeks. He's passed his levels 1, 2 and 3 Ducklings awards too, what a star! He's worked hard considering he's just turned 4, and it's been a team effort by people to make sure he's been at the pool at the right times every day. He's pleased with himself and I am a VERY proud Daddy. Headed home via the swings as usual, and then we had a think about what to do. We'd been thinking about going for an adventure on a bus, so we eventually arrived at the idea of a trip to Hunstanton, letting the bus driver do the hard work. The first Hunny bus was a single decker so we waited for the next one and made sure we got the top-deck, front seats - childish, but Sam’s a child (and it’s something his mummy STILL does to this day as well). The weather was iffy - black clouds here, blue sky there…..but who cares! First job at Hunstanton was dinner, and we had fish and chips out of the paper on the seafront. The leftover chips provided great entertainment as we threw them in the air for the diving seagulls to catch while we were scoffing, who should wander past but Dave Benson-Phillips, one of our favourite people (Google it). Slightly surreal seeing DBP dodging our wayward chips until we realised who it was. So onto the beach for a walk along the sand and a ride on the horses, from there to Blackbeard’s Crazy Golf, then an ice cream and a slide. On to the obstacle course near the Sealife Centre (sorry about the trainers, it was a REALLY big puddle, doh). Three laps of that then it was hometime - or so Sam thought. Daddy had a plan though, and it was timed to perfection for us to board The Wash Monster for a drive/sail around The Wash. We’ve been looking at this crazy machine for ages but it is “slightly” pricey - so I saved up the money we would have used for rides on other days (Sam always accepts “I haven’t got much money” because he is a complete star) and we made the trip! It was a lot of fun driving into the sea and then sailing along, a little weird but fun nonetheless. Main thing is that Sam loved it. All to soon we were back on dry land and making our way to the bus station. We were late getting home, so we delayed bath time until the morning. Bedtime went nicely, and I brought Sam into Daddy’s bed at 4.24 after he was crying in a bad dream. This morning we played some good games, including the current favourite “Bob’s Fire Station”, then it was back to mummy’s. Sam’s being taken to Wales for a christening this weekend. I hope they have a safe journey, and I’ll see my little superstar again on Tuesday. Love you Sam! To report this post follow the permalink aboveJust annoyed
Source: Eddie2sox Whatever you think, whatever your sex is...... My last post was inspired by this email from Sam's mum:
.... as you know we are off to Wales! The plan at the moment is that we will leave around lunchtime Saturday from here, so if you can get Sam back here for 1200 then we can leave soon afterwards. Lunchtime Saturday it says. Then she instantly reduces it to "9 or 10". I am just annoyed that with no discussion it becomes 9 or 10. It might not seem much to people who read this, but for me, 3 hours less with my son is a big deal. If you think otherwise, tough. Stop reading my blog. To report this post follow the permalink aboveWomen!
Source: Eddie2sox Jumped out of bed in a great mood this morning, which promptly got crapped all over.....and guess what caused it? Bloody women! Well, one bloody woman in particular, Sam's mum. First of all she's insisted that Sam has to be back at her house at 9 on Saturday morning instead of 12. The overwhelming reason for this? Well, they're off to a christening in Wales and were going to leave after I returned Sam at noon - but the woman who is christening her kids has now decided to visit Sam's mum in King's Lynn and they need to leave early so she can cook food for the chrisening. What possessed her to go away immediately prior to her kids' christening? As usual this affects me and Sam and our time together has another three hours lopped off, just like that. Secondly, Sam's mum has always been completely disorganised domestically, so she asked me "Can you bring back his blue shirt he wore the other day (fair enough) plus any smart trousers you have for him at the moment". Well, I don't have ANY long trousers of Sam's here at the moment, they must all be lying in piles of unwashed laundry at her place somewhere. Annoying, but not unexpected to have it confirmed that her household skills are at the same level they always were. Personally I find it extremely easy to put washing in the machine, dry it, put it away. Not rocket science is it? Finally I noticed yesterday that their car is not taxed - it ran out at the end of June. Now, as it's a really old rustbucket this leads me to doubt whether it is MOT'd and insured as well. This happens every six months, they don't bother re-taxing. Now they have a LOT of money coming into that house so finance isn't a problem, and if I can be bothered to keep my car inside the law then I expect them to do the same if Sam has to travel in it. I did used to keep mentioning it to them when it happened before but it never had any impact, so this time I've just reported it to Norfolk police, DVLA, and his boss at RAF Marham. Plus the head of police at Marham. Idiot! Yes I am annoyed! Anyway, got another voluntary shift from 10 til 2 today, did another last night 6 til 10, and after that housework. It was going to be a fun, productive day, now it's ruined. Bloody women!
Late Breaking News - This Update One Hour Later
After sending an email objecting, but accepting, the reduced times, I just got this reply:
"Actually, this is us all doing you a favour by rearranging things so that you could have Sam at all."
I now retract everything I said and offer a million thanks that so many people are going so far out of their way to make my life better. To report this post follow the permalink aboveYum Yum!
Source: Eddie2sox I'm in the process of emptying the freezer at the moment - and tonight's tea is going to be great! I found some scallops and some prawns in the bottom of the freezer, so they're going to be my tea, along with salad and a little dressing. Pretty decadent! I can't remember why I bought them, maybe to impress a young lady who knows. Definitely going to impress myself though. Then for the next day or two it's the usual living off the remains of Sunday's roast chicken, leftovers rule!
I am picking Sam up tomorrow afternoon, and on the menu for him is turkey meatloaf one night, and spaghetti bolognaise the other. He had MacDonalds again today at his mum's house, not so good. I limit Sam to MacD once every 5 to 6 weeks, as a treat. Anyway, my week is looking good, Sam tomorrow and Wednesday, voluntary shifts Wednesday evening and Thursday daytime, a job interview, and then Sam again Friday and Saturday.
Good to see Super Leeds are only 12 points behind the rest of Division Three teams now, after winning at Tranmere on Saturday. Lovely to see the team and the management bonding so well too, and according to a friend who still goes to the games, the fans were fantastic all day. As the new song goes "Tresor Kandol, scored a ****ing great goal, in a scouse ****hole, in a scouse ****hole". COME ON LEEDS! To report this post follow the permalink aboveFire Station & Hot At The Lake - A Near Perfect Day
Source: Eddie2sox What a great Saturday, one of our best ever! Home To Start
Sam appeared in Daddy’s bed about 5 in the morning and promptly fell asleep until half past six. Nice. It’s such a “right” feeling having Sam there, snoring quietly, and I miss that when he’s not around. So, up and at ‘em, the plan was for a lazy morning before heading to the Fire Station Open Day and straight from there to Bawsey Lakes. Coco Pops, toast, Tracey Beaker, Lego website, sports day outside, Batman, baseball, catapult practice (Auntie Lou be afraid, Sam scored two direct hits on Daddy’s head!), we had a few “quiet and relaxing” hours. We then put our picnic together, the alfresco eating version of the Meatfeast pizza, NO fruit or vegetables, today was 100% MAN’S PICKERNICKER! We had chicken drumsticks. Mini sausages. Mini scotch eggs. Ham rolls. Hula Hoops!! And Penguins (we love ripping their heads off and drinking the blood, while chewing the flippers). Or maybe it was the small choccy bar version….
Fire Station Open Day
First port of call was the Fire Station Open Day. We headed on down and were directed by King’s Lynn’s only traffic warden “Blakey” onto a playing field to park - we chose to park under the crossbar of a football pitch - just because we can! Under the underpass and into the station, and it was REALLY good. Not just fire related people, but all the emergency services were there, police (booooo), ambulance, coastguard, American fire-fighters with an American fire engine, and RAF “firemen” (the only emergencies they ever have is being five minutes late for yet another meal). We had a really fun time. The police took Sam’s fingerprints (like father like son eh?) and gave him some goodies. The police lady was actually VERY cute, I wonder if she was a real copper at all! We teamed up to “put out a fire” which involved me pumping water by hand and Sam aiming the hose at a target. We watched some demos including the ace “chip pan fire” one, where the flames really do blast out - does anybody have a chip pan these days? The RAF firemen got their annual chance to actually use their fire engine. The air ambulance was up and down like a Ronaldo at the World Cup. We had a compulsory ice cream then Sam got into KLFM’s Black Jet Saab. Nice car, needs a clean though! The KLFM lad and lassie were lovely though, and Sam profited to the tune of a T-shirt and a key ring. Sam couldn’t see over the dashboard though, but then again I probably wouldn’t either - how Simon Rowe manages I’ll never know! Sam decided that the stick of rock that the police gave him would be a present for Mummy, then off we went.
Bawsey Lakes Fun
Plan took a slight diversion at this point, as we zoomed home for a, ahem, pit-stop, before heading off to Bawsey Lakes. We love this place, it’s fast becoming a very special Sam And Daddy place. Yes, the litter is terrible, but you don’t have to sit on a pile of rubbish do you! We sat in the car park for a start and tucked into our picnic, lording it over the other folk arriving without any food at all. Be off with ya, foodless hoi-polloi! The water wasn’t too chilly and we spent three hours jumping in and out of the lake, interspersed with re-applying sun cream all over Sam, and playing with Sam’s Bob the Builder toys. A bunch of ravers turned up too, set up two amps and started playing music, so we had a soundtrack as well, cheers boys and girls! Loved the times we stood halfway up the beach and counted down……5, 4, 3, 2, 1, GO……then ran and jumped into the water. Stupid Daddy didn’t take spare clothes for himself, doh! I have to say, the quality of totty on show was absolutely phenomenal, those eastern European girls sure know how to look after themselves. Sam pulled one too! At one point I am SURE Sam was standing nipple-deep in the water bobbing from side to side, nodding his head in time with the ravers’ music! We loved getting wet in the lake then rolling around on the sand, ending up looking like Sand Monsters! Which of course meant another trip to the water to get clean. I made Sam put his Ferrari hat on whenever he was playing out of the water, which amused and confused him in equal measures. Altogether a perfect afternoon. I think Sam must have been pretty tired by now, because he didn’t protest when it was home time. Back at the flat we shelved the tea idea, and instead finished off the remainder of our huge picnic. Sam got chucked in the bath (which is now FULL of sand!) and we had a nice hour and a half of calming down and just being together , father and son. It’s rare time and it’s precious.
Woolpack!
Later in the evening I tried to push myself out of the depression a bit and went to The Woolpack. I’d not been up there since the day of the smoking ban. I bought a beer and hid in the garden! After a while though I had a really good, long chat with Danny the Landlord. It wasn’t too scary. Plus, bonus (THANK YOU AGAIN KARMA) I got some wages for work I’d done before I went a bit mental! Saturday was a good day. To report this post follow the permalink aboveKLFM - We Know Where You Live!
Source: Eddie2sox We staged a daring photo opportunity with the KLFM Courtesy Car at the fire station open day.... Sam took the wheel of the KLFM Saab and was rewarded with a KLFM T-shirt and keyring for his troubles, thanks Radio people! Full report later. To report this post follow the permalink aboveSports Day, Arms Race Against Auntie Lou & Meatfeast Picnic Planning!
Source: Eddie2sox Today's been utterly fantastic, began with a lie-in, ending now with Sam sleeping in the next room. Perfect. I was amazed to sleep in until 9 this morning and found that the cold has nearly gone completely. Great stuff. Headed off into town to close the karma-provided Halifax account, post some letters and job applications, and get some stamps. Hassles in the Post Office, where there were only two windows open for business during Friday lunchtime, not very good chaps, could do better. Posted another 5 competition entries, and yes I am expecting another win from those 5. As a result of the under-staffing I was late picking Sam up.
Not that it really mattered. Sam passed his swimming lessons course this morning! He's going to have a cloth badge to be sewn onto his swimming shorts, how cool is that. Amazingly, at just over 4 years old, Sam has more swimming qualifications than his Daddy! We've had a nice afternoon, playing a lot, and with another trip into town.
You see, we have unfinished business with Auntie Lou. Business of a water-fight kind. Since last summer there's been something of an arms race going on, with both sides upgrading their armoury - today we invested in some artillery. Namely a catapult and a job-lot of waterbombs. Auntie Lou's gonna be like a drowned rat. Of course we used some of the bombs for practice when we got home, it went MOST satisfactorily. We're coming to GET YA!
We pressed on with some more Ferrari spraying, once again decorating the grass too (see pic) - don't tell Roy who done it. Next-door Matt arrived home from work and Sam delighted in telling him what we were doing etc.
In town we raided Sainsburys for the doings for tomorrow's picnic - mini-sausages, ham and rolls, chicken drumsticks, mini scotch eggs, it'll be a man's picnic and no mistake. On the way back from town we had the usual half-hour on the swings in the park, Sam had fun swinging, Daddy had fun flirting with the cute and unobtainable chick with the shy smile. Oh, it was fun pushing Sam too of course, ahem.
After tea we piled outside with lots of sports and games stuff and held a sports day. Sam won nearly everything as usual, the little cheater! We both suffered thistle related foot injuries. Next-door Matt was out and we had another good chat about catapults, Ferraris and cats.
And so it was Sam's bedtime, which went beautifully. The best few seconds of life are those when Sam's eyes droop and he goes from being awake to asleep, makes me feel all responsible and proud. Love my little superstar! To report this post follow the permalink aboveCardboard Ferrari I
Source: Eddie2sox It's been mentioned a few times in this blog, but now we're getting some steam up, so I intend to make it a regular, possibly sporadic, series. Here's Number I (that's one, for the text-speak generation)..... Right. We've got the box for the chassis and the foam for the wings and spoilers (thanks Nana & Grandad). We've got super-thick loo roll holders and enormous bubblewrap for exhaust pipes and the seat padding (Thanks Woodman's Cottage pub). Today we got our first donation from a multi-national company, namely Shell UK!
A while ago Sam and me looked at some pictures of F1 Ferraris on the Interweb, at the time to see what the wheels and tyres looked like. Sam asked "Will you paint those pictures Daddy?", pointing at the sponsors' logos. As I am to art what Stephen Hawking is to rhythmic gymnastics, we decided to do some begging. We sent letters, and stamped, self-addressed envelopes, to the companies that we saw on the Ferrari pictures, asking for a couple of stickers to adorn our creation.
Today we got our first replies. One, from Fiat Group, was simply our own envelope enclosed with a compliments slip saying "Sorry, forgot to attach your envelope!" - I am hoping they have sent us some stickers separately, intending to send our envelope back to us, but forgetting. Hey, it might happen.....
Most impressively today was our parcel (yes, parcel) from Shell International Ltd, and namely Jackie Leddra. We had hoped for two stickers, one for each side of the car. What we got is shown in the picture attached to this blog. As well as two sheets of Shell stickers in various sizes, Sam has received three sheets of stickers showing the Ferrari F1 team, and most amazingly of all a SERIOUSLY nice Ferrari/Shell baseball cap. Best of all though was the letter that Jackie included with the goodies, which reads:
"Dear Mr Ruddlesdin, Thank you for your letter of 30th July regarding your request for some Shell stickers to adorn the Ferrari car you and your son are making out of cardboard. I am very pleased to enclose some stickers and a Ferrari hat for Sam. Just make sure he doesn't take the car out when it's raining!!! Ask Sam to send me a nice picture of it when it's complete and he'll win a prize.
Yours sincerely, Shell International Limited"
How lovely is that! Needless to say, as well as the stickers etc, all the letters and other stuff will be stored away for Sam to look back on when he's older and wiser.
Tomorrow I pick Sam up at half twelve and we're back to work on the Cardboard Ferrari. More red spray paint madness outside and we're going to start work on the tyres with newly acquired black poster paint (for tyres read modified paper plates). Sam is going to LOVE his new hat.
Check back here for further Cardboard Ferrari Updates!!!!! And THANK YOU SHELL! To report this post follow the permalink aboveCrap Parking League XIX
Source: Eddie2sox I always see the very worst parking when I don't have my phone with me....so here's another example from this evening.... The humble VW Golf catapults into joint-third place. Traditionally a boy-racer car, are they badly parked because their drivers don't have the necessary skills? Or do you know of some other reason?
p.s. can anyone identify the Green American Monstrosity from an earlier blog? Or the Mystery Rover?
Table:
New Shape Mini.....4 Vauxhall Corsa.....3 Honda Civic.....2 VW Golf.....2 VW Bora.....1.5 Vauxhall Vectra.....1.5 Vauxhall Combo van.....1 Peugeot 206.....1 Mystery Rover.....1 Huge Green American Monstrosity.....1 Ford Focus.....1 Original Mini.....1 Ford Ka.....1
Send me any pics of bad parking you collect to trix68@hotmail.co.uk
And why not peruse the Net's best bad parking website at: http://www.crap-parking.co.uk/index.php?mode=home To report this post follow the permalink aboveKarma Strikes Again!
Source: Eddie2sox Good old karma, it looks after nice people doesn't it. Got a letter this morning, re-directed from my parents' house in Lincolnshire. It was addressed to me plus two of my old football co-defendants, Steve Doc and Stan, and it was the statement of our World Cup 94 account! Of course England never qualified for that tournament, so ending our dreams of shmoozing round America in an open top Cadillac, staying at cheap motels, picking up local chicks etc.
Anyway, the statement says the balance is £72.90 - and as Stan and Steve both took their share out of the account to pay off various fines, this is my money! Hoorah, thanks Karma! Just at the right time. To report this post follow the permalink aboveNurse!
Source: Eddie2sox Urgh. E2S is unwell.... Right now I have a very sore throat which promises to get worse overnight, bunged up and headachey. I am self-treating with a four pack of Becks beer.
Last night I was at my voluntary work until 6 this morning, and very busy indeed. I was on shift with a very good friend, and we were hoping to catch up with how our lives were doing.....no such luck. At five past three we started talking, but that lasted only 2 minutes, and we never had another chance. The Sunday night shift is always busy with people really in need of help, so there's a real feeling of satisfaction and job well done. Didn't help me and my mate talk through our own problems though!
So today I had a snooze then started on the monthly stats for my voluntary group. Accompanied by BBC Radio Norfolk. A few years ago I would not dream of listening to the local beeb, guess I'm getting old. Today Wally Webb described my contribution to his "tide in tide out" prize fund - a butt bucket (portable ashtray and dog end store thing), and I added a little to the morning show's debate on the Alonso/Hamilton squabble. Beeb Norfolk is as interactive as KLFM or Fen Radio, which is a nice feeling, it's warming to hear your own opinion or remarks on air.
Had another snooze in the afternoon.
The Woolpackers
I just want to mention my mates from The Woolie. They are complete stars. I haven't been there for weeks and weeks. Last Friday Old Bob phoned me to tell me to get my ass back down there, as people missed me and they wanted my opinions on the routine stuff in life (like Napoleon's wallpaper). Then on Saturday I got a call from Barney The Builder, saying that people missed me, we love you you idiot, and come back soon.
To be honest I don't deserve mates like that, but I am ******* glad I have them. I'm not sure if I can face the Woolie right now, but I think it may be OK if I did go back. It's a people thing. I am happy on my own right now, and I have had a pint in a few town centre pubs, alone. Very wary about groups of people, scared actually, but I hope I can go to The Woolie some time this week.
So. Not a bad day overall. Still feeling down and hopeless, but maybe a little less after hearing from me mates. Big cold coming I think, so I ought to get the Night Nurse in.
Any nurses out there want to look after me in the night? Didn't think so. To report this post follow the permalink above Oxburgh Hall Civil War Re-Enactment
Source: Eddie2sox We headed off to see a battle at Oxburgh Hall, and we had a great time! Collected Sam on Friday afternoon, and we immediately headed off to the park, Sam on his bike, Daddy running alongside, he can get some speed up nowadays. Not a lot there these days, just three “big” swings, but we only need one of them and we had a nice time singing as usual, watching the trains coming in and going out, and spotting the builders’ machines driving past. Home again and Sam chose ham sandwiches for tea - round ones please - which he had in a sandwich box in his “trench”. We’d been playing soldiers and Sam wanted something to hide behind so we arranged his duvet on his bed and it became a trench (he calls it a trudge). Tea over it was bathtime, then bedtime after a cosy snuggle on the settee watching some live athletics on the telly. Sam has been awake a few nights coughing apparently, so I burned eucalyptus oil in the living room and in his bedroom, as it is supposed to clear the tubes. It seemed to work a treat! I topped up the oil in Sam’s bedroom at 10 o’clock, and he only had one single cough before joining me in my room at about 4 in the morning - soon after he had a bit of a cough, no eucalyptus in my room you see! He slept in until half past six on Saturday morning, then we bounced, as usual, out of bed, up and at ‘em! We set off for Oxburgh Hall just after 10, and arrived safe and sound after taking time along the way to show Sam the route we were taking on the roadmap. He loves maps. He actually did quite well following where we were, and I only had to point out once where the Hall was, he remembered it photographically after that. At Oxburgh Hall I had expected to pay about £10 for the two of us, but we were only charged £3.50, talk about great value for money. The day was called “Defend The Hall” and was based around the story of a Royalist retreat from King’s Lynn, and their attempted defence of Oxburgh Hall from chasing Parliamentarians. The programme reads: 1100 - Royalist encampment keeping watch at Oxburgh. 1200 - Royalist soldiers enter camp, having retreated from King’s Lynn. They have a wounded officer with them. 1215 - Troops drill in preparation to defend the Hall. 1245 - Soldiers about their duties in camp. 1300 - Parliament troops attack the camp. 1345 - 17th century meal. 1415 - Entertainment - music & puppets. 1515 - A stronger Parliamentarian force returns to attack the Hall. Terms for the Hall’s surrender are discussed. 1530 - Troops assemble for drill. Oxburgh Hall is surrendered. We had a great time. You’re allowed to wander round the camp in between battles, and then you get ushered behind rope lines. The initial excitement was the cavaliers (in red) returning carrying a stretcher bearing the wounded Sir Henry Bedingfield. Incidentally, the Bedingfield family still live in the Hall, I tried to find Daniel to punch his lights out but he must have been on holiday. These troops then formed up to perform a display of musketry, pike, and cannon. Wow, are those muskets loud. And wow wow wow, are those cannons even louder! We’d forgotten to take Sam’s ear defenders so I had to cover his ears with my hands. What a racket! This was from, maybe 6 muskets and one gun - I just can’t imagine how loud and smoky the battlefield would have been with thousands of muskets and cannons all firing at the same time, scary stuff. The display was great though, the “officers” trying to keep the “men” in line, while the men kept making cheeky remarks to the audience. Great stuff. The next event was the first attack by the Roundheads (in blue) on the camp, which was very noisy, very smoky, and excellent viewing! A Royalist got “killed”, then when his comrades were advancing, camp followers stole his shoes, belt and money, how naughty. After a great fight the Royalists beat off the Roundheads, taking some of them prisoner and persuading them to “turn their coats” and join them in the next fight. The officers demanded a round of applause - LOUDER and the dead will arise! - and Sam and me headed off for a walk. First stop the shop, hoping to find another magnet to add to our collection on our fridge door - no luck with the magnet but Sam did find himself a helmet that he liked (a plastic one). Next we headed off around one of the three nature walks that start from the gardens, we (well, Sam) chose My Lady’s Walk, which was absolutely beautiful. At this point, I wish we could post more than one picture in these blogs, one just doesn’t do some blogs justice! How’s about it IMM? We rolled down the slopes around the parterre (Google it!) together - only banged heads once! - then went to have a look around the fascinating walled garden. Sam was astounded by the size of the sunflowers - they must have been 4 metres tall (12 feet for oldies), cool! He also took an interest in several other flowers, asking what they were, and helpfully Oxburgh Hall places small signs near their plants telling you what they are! I really like the fact that Sam is interested in the nature of a place as well as the fighting and shooting stuff. Soon we headed back to camp to watch the puppet show, Sam really enjoyed it. It was a re-hash of the three billy goats gruff, called the Three Dragons Puff. Instruments were handed into the children watching, for them to make a noise with when “their” character appeared - there were two scallop shells to be banged together for the small dragon, two wooden tubes for the medium dragon, and a big drum for the big dragon. The troll had a weird thing with a spring and a cylinder that made a very troll-y noise! The story was very home-made and great fun, Sam loved it. It was about time for an ice cream, so we found some shade under a tree to tuck in. We planned it well, so we were very close to the fence where the next battle would happen. And all of a sudden it did. More Roundheads came back and after another great scrap the Royalists surrendered. Lots of carefully rehearsed ad-libs from the combatants made it a treat for us adults, while seeing a real, old-fashioned battle kept the nippers enthralled. One Royalist officer had run away to hide in a tent during the battle, and was found, tried, and executed by firing squad, hard lines dude. What a great display, I’ll be writing to the group who did it to say thanks. Sam had had enough noise and smoke by now, so we got in the car, pumped the aircon up to max, and came home, reading the map in reverse. We didn’t have a great deal of time left by now, so I made Sam his tea of spaghetti bolognaise (he scoffed it and said it was delicious - high praise indeed from a 4 year old), then a quick bath and then a REAL treat for Sam. His first ever viewing of Some Mother’s Do Have ‘Em! He’s a lucky chap, he has so many “firsts” to come - and Frank Spencer did not disappoint. Sam thought it was fantastic. “What a clumsy funny man“ sums it up. All too soon it was back-to-mummy’s time, and another weekend ended. Love you Sam! To report this post follow the permalink aboveWhat Does This Dream Mean?
Source: Eddie2sox I just woke up from a really entertaining dream, anyone know what it might mean? It was set in the Big Brother house, and I was a housemate in the show. There were only 8 or 9 of us left, including Little Miss Lemon from The Woolpack for some reason. Now, each week one housemate was allowed an outside visit for a short time, and this week it was my turn. I decided I would sneak some more clothes back in and also some beer, so when it was time to return I set of a smoke bomb (!) near the entrance to cause a diversion, then stashed my loot in a bin near the back of the house, in a yard that was rarely used.
Back in the house I quietly let a few people know what I'd done, but somehow BB found out too. We were lined up in the swimming pool and asked if anybody had any extra items with them that they hadn't brought into the house at the start. My stash was still hidden, therefore not "with" me, so I answered no. BB knew the truth of course and I was kicked out of the house. I remember looking in The News Of The World next day but feeling disappointed when there was absolutely nothing about me in it. I put that down to the fact that I was booted after 8 o'clock, so missed the deadline.
I felt a bit hard done to, so had I decided to become the first person to be kicked out of the house twice. This meant getting back inside somehow of course. Before leaving I'd confided my plan in a housemate who "looked" exactly like the current housemate called Ziggy, but he was called either Andrew or Tom (!). On the way out I'd loudly and confidently told them "See you in a few weeks", knowing they would deliberately leak my plan to BB - the "few weeks" remark was so BB thought they had a little space before I tried to get back in. No way!
The plan was to return the next day. Amazingly, that night the BB show was coming from a huge theatre in a big city somewhere! The way I got back in was to join the huge public queue for admission to the show, in an electricians' van, as a friend of Andrew/Tom made the customary diversion by pretending to be blind and accidentally wrecking an ice cream stall. My story worked and we were ushered into the technical area under the theatre and I was in!
I headed up into the main area of stalls in the theatre, near the back, behind a huge section of "women only" seats. I sat next to some other people who I knew, can't remember who they were, maybe the other housemates? Well, security was very tight at this show, in case I tried to get in, and I sat smugly at the back of the hall watching the acts, with the idea of owning up at the end after enjoying all the acts on stage. Halfway through a load more people came into the theatre, including these two couples who were "on the large side". One of them went to get food, and brought back four burgers - two of them had cheeseburgers, two had plain. Thing is, this bloke looked a bit like Andy from Little Britain, and handed out the burgers saying "Cheeseburger do, cheeseburger don't, cheeseburger do, cheeseburger don't" according to the type of burger. His voice was EXACTLY like Andy's too. Next, some laddish blokes sat in the row in front of us, recently vacated by a number of ladies who had gone to the toilets. We told the lads that the seats were taken, and they moved to the back row.
Now, whether these lads were under-cover security I'm not sure, but the very next act on was TWO Andy From Little Britain look-alikes, wearing nappies for some reason, and they headed straight out into the audience looking for something. I shrank back behind the seat in front, but a few seconds later on of the Andy's said "Hello Simon". ARGH! I legged it.
Started out towards the bottom (front) of the theatre but security men dressed in black suits started swarming up towards me. Change of plan, I headed upwards, dodging the Andys and more guards on the way. Eventually and a long chase with lots of dodging I reached the top floor. The door was guarded by a security lady (actually on of my son's carers at his nursery!) who tried to stop me entering the big square room at the top but failed (later in my statement to the security company I told them that the female guard had tried to stop me with a knife, when I actually saw her "pull" the blade and let me get by).
This room was large and square, one wall blank, windows round the rest. The security men had backed off a bit now, assuming I was trapped - which I was. I ran to the first wall, looked out the windows wondering about jumping onto an adjacent roof - no buildings on that side at all. Second wall, there was a roof about 10 metres below - but also about 10 metres away, horizontally.....no way I could make that from a standing jump from the window sill.....third wall - the windows were too small to get out of. I did see hundreds of people in the streets below though, some singing "Come On Simon" etc.
So I was stuck. The guards were looking smug and switched off. One last chance, I ran for the exit, made it onto the long, long carpeted slope that ran straight to the front door. There were no guards around there at all, so I dived down it and slid all the way down and straight out of the front door of the theatre onto the pavement outside, in front of a double decker bus. I started jumping around wildly shouting "I did it, I did it!", the people on the bus were going mad too, then the other housemates came rushing out of the theatre too.
Then I woke up.
What the HELL does THAT mean? To report this post follow the permalink aboveOh What A Beautiful Morning!
Source: Eddie2sox How strange, my moods are up and down quicker than Paris Hilton's pants these days.... So it's Friday morning for this unemployed stuntman. The sun is up, the air smells clean and fresh (until people get in their cars and go to work), and the Moon is out too! I've already been to pick up the Lynn News, there will be a whole new job section in there today.
Yesterday I made the first moves for five more jobs from Tuesday's paper. "Fly my pretty's" I murmured as I chucked them in the Tesco postbox. Entered four competitions from Tuesday's paper too, trust me, I WILL win one of them! Also sent off the letters to companies asking for corporate stickers to adorn me and Sam's "Woodmans Ferrari". Got stuff done yesterday despite feeling like complete dog pooh!
Today? Well, I'm picking Sam up at half three, so that is ace. Tomorrow we're going to check out a battle re-enactment at Oxburgh Hall, only costs a fiver for adults to get in. Sam will love the noise and colour - I hope! Maybe it will make it into the Scrapbook too. Of course, the full report will be exclusively here, online at IMM.CO.UK forward slash NSD. The pic is a typical page from Sam's scrapbook. We're keeping everything, including receipts, tickets, you name it, and hopefully in 30 years time Sam will have fun looking through it.... "Blimey, a burger and chips for only £2.60! It's £55.99 nowadays!"
Also yesterday, finally got the email from MyFootballClub, that we're going for it! This is a collective group of people who will be paying a small amount of money into a central fund and buying a real, actual football club! As I'd had the money locked away in expectation I paid up and will be a part owner of a club. I know you can buy shares in lots of clubs, but this group allows members to vote on player transfers, team tactics, you name it, like fantasy football but for real. This really perked me up, maybe it's the reason I'm mad for it today? To report this post follow the permalink aboveIMM/KLFM/Fen Radio/Pirate Radio
Source: Eddie2sox Corporate stuff? It seems that IMM and a few local radio stations are all in the same boat. I'm not sure what I think about that to be honest, good or bad.
Is IMM's owner using Norfolk and the South-West as guinea-pigs before launching further afield? Probably. Seems like it anyway. Fen Radio and KLFM breakfast shows, much as I like them, are very similar now and probably reading off the same instruction sheet. Deffo posting blogs daily as a corporate requirement. And recently, doing it as early as possible to get it out of the way.
IMM is doing a good job binning the advertising blogs by the way, Photo Restorer Man must be treading a thin line after pitching his business at flood victims! The Instant Cash idiots were swiftly dealt with, well played chaps.
The functionality of IMM has been really bad for a few days too, I am looking around for a different place to blog. And printing my blogs that I want to keep too, cos they'll be binned if I jump ship or if IMM goes down the pan.
I like the IMM environment but it just doesn't feel right at the moment? To report this post follow the permalink aboveUrgh!
Source: Eddie2sox Feeling absolutely bloody terrible today.... ....Sunday's cold was obviously just lurking and come back with reinforcements, the gastritis is killing me, and I am feeling really fed-up and isolated and down too. Not a good mix. I was going to write a fab blog about the week with Sam, but that'll have to wait. To report this post follow the permalink aboveCrap Parking League XVIII
Source: Eddie2sox Another contribution from roving reporter Letty.... Letty claims this is "the worst parking ever", what do you think? Welcome to the CPL, FORD KA!
Table:
New Shape Mini.....4 Vauxhall Corsa.....3 Honda Civic.....2 VW Bora.....1.5 Vauxhall Vectra.....1.5 Vauxhall Combo van.....1 VW Golf.....1 Peugeot 206.....1 Mystery Rover.....1 Huge Green American Monstrosity.....1 Ford Focus.....1 Original Mini.....1 Ford Ka.....1
Send me any pics of bad parking you collect to trix68@hotmail.co.uk
And why not peruse the Net's best bad parking website at: http://www.crap-parking.co.uk/index.php?mode=home To report this post follow the permalink above |
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