Posted in July 2007

RIP Phil Drabble

Source: Eddie2sox
Monday 30th July 2007, 8:51pm

The well-loved presenter of One Man And His Dog has passed away, aged 93.

Phil Drabble, the voice of chilhood favourite One Man And His Dog, has died aged 93.

The Beeb says "Phil Drabble brought the countryside into the homes of BBC viewers and listeners and became one of the BBC's best loved faces and voices. He will be remembered with deep affection and gratitude by millions of viewers and listeners who will mourn his passing."

I am actually surprised how sad I feel about this. OMAHD was a regular show on our family telly, entertaining and completely harmless. I loved it. I was telling Sam about it only a few weeks ago when we watched a sheepdog display at Dinosaur Land. I think Sam would have enjoyed the programme.

Phil Drabble also inspired a regular sketch on my all-time favourite radio show, Radio One's Mark & Lard. They substituted the dogs for frogs, and Phil Drabble became Scoff Cruddle. The female frogs who coralled flocks of tadpoles around ponds were known as bitches. There was even a song....first line...."If I could give you any piece of advice.......get yourself a bitch!"

So long Phil, you're one of my icons.

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Shoes Off!

Source: Eddie2sox
Monday 30th July 2007, 8:35pm

If You Want Bates Out!

Following the success of the shoe waving Iraqi attempts at ousting Saddam, this year's protest at Elland Road is following suit. The picture shows the first "Shoes off, if you want Bates out" protest of the season, in a friendly at Burnley last weekend. Remember where you heard about it first!

We need to Get The Chelsea Out Of Leeds, starting with the ultra-crooked Papa Smurf Ken Bates. There are no players. The ones left haven't been paid. Cresswell's gone to Hull for £300,ooo (quote "I have no choice with administration, I don't want to go to Hull"). Danny Rose to Yids for a million. Healy to Fulham for just over a million. Meanwhile Super Leeds are not allowed to bring players in yet. There is no registered goalkeeper over the age of 19.

So. Altogether now....."Shoes Off If You Want Bates Out!"

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Salt & Vinegar World Cup

Source: Eddie2sox
Monday 30th July 2007, 7:16am

Ooops, I never managed to post the complete results of this project, sorry crisp lovers....

Rules

Matches were decided on the basis of comparing:

1 - Crispness

2 - Flavour

3 - Size of crisp

4 - Aroma

5 - Packaging

6 - More-ish-ness (don't think that's a real word)

Each scored from 1 to 5 points, highest score savoury snack won.

Competitors were collected over a 7 day period prior to the start of the tournament, wherever I found them. If your favourite wasn’t included, send me a sample of 4 packs ready for the next running of the world’s most significant salt & vinegar flavoured potato/maize based snack knockout competition….

Round One

The Real McCoys Ridge Cut Salt & Malt Vinegar 20 : 14 Snack A Jacks Salt & Vinegar

Walkers Salt & Vinegar 21 : 22 Seabrook Sea Salt & Vinegar

Walkers Squares Salt & Vinegar 16 : 21 Pringles Salt & Vinegar

Tesco Crunchy Sticks Salt & Vinegar 18 : 17 Walkers Baked Salt & Vinegar

Tesco Twirls Salt & Vinegar 11 : 12 Tesco Salt & Vinegar

Tesco Finest Sea Salt & West Country Cider Vinegar 14 : 18 Morrisons Salt & Vinegar

Byes: Discos Salt & Vinegar, Kettle Chips Sea Salt & Balsamic Vinegar

Round Two

Kettle Chips Sea Salt & Balsamic Vinegar 21 : 19 Discos Salt & Vinegar

Morrisons Salt & Vinegar 17 : 22 Seabrook Sea Salt & Vinegar

Pringles Salt & Vinegar 22 : 16 Tesco Crunchy Sticks Salt & Vinegar

The Real McCoys Ridge Cut Salt & Malt Vinegar 20 : 14 Tesco Salt & Vinegar

Semi-Finals

Kettle Chips Sea Salt & Balsamic Vinegar 20 : 22 The Real McCoys Ridge Cut Salt & Malt Vinegar

Seabrook Sea Salt & Vinegar 21 : 19 Pringles Salt & Vinegar

Final

The Real McCoys Ridge Cut Salt & Malt Vinegar 19 : 22 Seabrook Sea Salt & Vinegar

A poor sample of McCoys handed the title to Seabrook’s finest! A meeting of ridged varieties, seems the IMM staff really do know their onions when it comes to crisps….

Norfolk Single Dad - Fearlessly Addressing Essential Consumer Issues Since, Errrm, February....

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IMM Bloggers FC

Source: Eddie2sox
Monday 30th July 2007, 5:28am

I threatened that I was going to start an online Sunday league football team, and did. They're doing well so far....

IMM Bloggers were 13th in the league when I took over, and now stand in 4th, catching up quick on the teams above. Our last game was a 10-3 victory over Little Creek Town, with goals from Munch, Roxy and Letty (who was Man Of The Match too). The Official report read thus:

"IMM Bloggers were on blazing form as they torched Little Creek Town 10 - 3.
IMM Bloggers applauded their defenders off the pitch after a performance Moore, Butcher and Adams would have been proud of.
The ball was at the feet of the IMM Bloggers players so often you wouldn't have been wrong calling them greedy.
Butterfingers? After watching Little Creek Town's goalie Emma Roids you'd be forgiven for thinking he has butterarms, butterhands and butterlegs. Must do butter… sorry, better.
Little Creek Town have lost their shape up front recently. They're strikers are more Lisa Riley than Holly Valance,
There are less suitable formations for Little Creek Town's squad than 3 6 1, but Yordan georgiev would be advised to ignore those too.
"Someone in this team will have to grab the ball by the horns if we're going to get anything out of this season," huffed manager Yordan georgiev following his side's poor showing.
You'd think at 10 - 3 IMM Bloggers would have made their point. There was plenty left in the tank which should leave Little Creek Town shuddering at how much worse it could have been."

Munch is top scorer so far this season with 28 goals in 16 games, followed by Roxy (24 in 15) and Letty (24 in 13). A certain N Single-Dad has set up most goals (15 in 14 games), then it's IMM's Matt (11 in 15) and Joe Rudd (11 in 14). We've had NO dismissals so far (well done team) but F. Businessman has 3 bookings already.

We're 8 points behind the league leaders with 14 games to play. And there are 10 places left in the team for players to be named, come on down!

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Daddy & Sam's Sunday

Source: Eddie2sox
Sunday 29th July 2007, 7:41pm

Bangers, crabs, chicken....

Sam was crying at quarter to five, so I went to bring him into Daddy’s bed. I had a BLOODY awful night’s sleep, I always do when Sam’s here as I am always wondering if he’s OK. Of course he is, but my mind won’t accept that.

Up with a jump and we played with the Lego banger track we made yesterday - pits included! Sam insisted on looking on the Internet at gymnastics - seems like his time at Lynnsport yesterday made a real impression. I looked up gymnastics stuff and they run proper courses for children from 4 to 15 years old. When I mentioned it later to Sam’s mummy she agreed. Anyway, Sam was amazed at what some of the “proper” gymnasts can do, and ran round the flat doing his impression of their moves for a while.

The weather looked bright from indoors, so we decided to make progress with our home-made Ferrari. Took it all outside and it was windy with massive dewfall. We went round the corner and were sheltered from the breeze and the sun had dried the grass, so me and Sam sprayed some more parts scarlet - until we ran out of paint, DOH! Still, we have made progress, which our sponsors (in chief, Woodmans) will be pleased about.

We came inside and Sam finished off his slice of Kaci’s birthday cake…..and then it was time to go. Four hours had gone already. The time just bloody flies past. I had prepared my walking stuff including stinky, cow-pooh boots, so we loaded the car and headed off. On the way Sam said he would miss me, which really tugs at the heart strings, but I know it’s not long until we’re together again. Love you Sampants.

Straight from dropping Sam off I drove into the Norfolk countryside for a nice weekend ramble. This time I headed to Morston, which is the place that me and Sam sailed off to see the seals from last year. The walk was great, advertised as 5 miles but actually nearer 6. There were a couple of small stretches along roads, but they were minor distractions. At one point I walked across the end of the runway of the long-defunct RAF Langham, which was both a fighter and bomber station in World War 2. As I walked down the dusty, cracked perry track towards the village of Cockthorpe I looked back and sat down for a few minutes. What a contrast that this remote concrete track, today looking and feeling warm, welcoming, just downright comforting in some ways, during the war would see truckloads of aircrew driven up the very same concrete track, feeling scared, lonely and wondering if they would even see this sight ever again, as they prepared to take off into war. Humbling stuff.

I eventually shook myself out of daydreaming and strolled through Cockthorpe, then took a right turn to follow a stream towards the sea. The path weaved through a nice water meadow, including a cliff! That’s right, a 10 metre cliff in Norfolk, and inland too. During this final part of the walk there were several times that small bunches of geese flapped and squawked around, which reminded me again of RAF Langham and the people who fought a war from there. Heavy, loud, seeming to defy physics to get airborne, these big geese and the old aircraft seem have a lot in common.

Back to the car park and I took a picture of the same boat I snapped as I was setting out. An hour and 55 minutes for the 6 miles. Also worried to notice a Pay & Display sign, which I hadn’t noticed before I set out, thankfully no ticket or clamp, phew. MORSTON QUAY IS PAY AND DISPLAY! From there I set out to Cromer to buy my mum and dad a dressed crab each (they‘d argue over one!), but instead found The Blakeney Crab Shed, a garden shed down a long path, that sells lovely crab - I know, I’ve just eaten mine and considered eating theirs as well…..so short-cut back to the road homeward, and an hour later I was back.

Time to roast a chicken!

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Daddy & Sam's Saturday

Source: Eddie2sox
Sunday 29th July 2007, 7:05pm

We had a good time, yet it still seemed to short!

Well, it’s been pretty good so far, this weekend I mean.

First, the bad stuff. Overnight on Friday night I acquired a cold. And the immersion stopped working, so there’s been no hot water. The fact that these minor setbacks have not sent me into a downward self-pitying grump is quite cool I feel. The cold was nearly gone by this morning, despite waking up all blocked-up, and I actually managed to get the hot water working too, all me own work!

So, the good stuff.

I picked Sam up a bit late, about twenty past eight, mainly due to the immersion and the “hard to get going” factor of having a cold. This week I had Sam with me from Saturday until Sunday, reason being that Sam’s mummy was going to a wedding on the Saturday, and could stay out late if Sam was with daddy. Suits me! So, back to the flats, and we had a game plan for the day, on a (fairly) tight schedule. Well, not such a tough schedule really, our first task was “playtime”. We nipped into town to find a birthday present for Sam’s friend Kaci (read a bout the party later), Sam chose both the present and card, we bought a bike lock for Sam’s bike so he can pedal into town in future, dropped off a large bagful of clothes at a charity shop, and acquired some stickers for the grid (again, see later).

Zoomed home, had ten minutes as promised to Sam, on the swings at the park, singing Sam’s own version of “This way, that way, forward and back, over the Irish Sea!” We also had a nose into the bowls club and watched the chaps playing a couple of games for about ten minutes. Back home, out come the stickers…..earlier on we had decided to make a “starting grid” for our banger races, with grid spaces for 12 cars. We drew around a Lego brick to make the half-rectangle shapes that you see on a Formula One grid, then stuck stickers on to show which was position 1, position 2, etc etc. See the aerial view in the pic! We “were” going to have a game of ice hockey too, but time was short so we loaded the gear in the car and set off for Sleaford.

It’s been a while since we went to see Nana and Grandad, so we put that right yesterday. It had also been FIVE weeks since we went to MacDonald’s, so we did that too! MacD at Holdingham roundabout near Sleaford was absolutely packed, so we chose to do a drive-through and take our booty elsewhere to scoff. We ended up eating in the car park across the road from Nana and Grandad’s house, and it was a nice treat. We surprised Sam’s grand-parents as we hadn’t told them we were coming! Didi the dog went crackers and Sam was the centre of attention. Sam was straight off outside with Didi so I had a chat with Dad - he is now over 7 stone in weight again, great stuff. Also looking healthier which is wonderful. As usual Sam did very well for presents, a belated birthday piggy bank from Auntie Lou was tops, Grandad gave Sam some new toy cars (well, a bulldozer, 2 buses and a limo!) and Nana came up with a fridge magnet in the shape of bagpipes that plays a Scots ditty when you press it. Me and Sam headed outside where Sam spotted The Wheelbarrow - the vehicle of doom that propels Sam at Warp Factor 6 around the garden as he screams and grimly hangs on to the sides. We went round the garden a few times with Didi, always ending up chasing Didi back into the back yard at - well it seemed to me who was pushing - about 85 miles an hour. Next we had our game of ice hockey - using the ELC golf clubs and ball. I showed Sam how ice hockey games start, and he loved it, running round the yard whacking the ball (when he could get it off Daddy, ha!), and Grandad had a go as well! I managed to get a photo of Grandad and Sam playing “ice hockey”, which looks good. We took Sam's scrapbook to show the grandparents, and they were really impressed with it, and wished they had the chance to do that kind of thing when they were young parents. All too soon it was time we headed back to King’s Lynn for Kaci’s birthday party, but as usual we stayed 40 minutes longer than we planned, it’s too hard to just leave. Sam hates leaving.

And so, back on the road, we “bip-bip-bee-bip-bipped” as we drove over the railway bridge to say bye-bye, and set off back down the A17. Stuck The Enemy CD on to cheer us up, Sam asked for “number one-oh”. This is a song called “This Song”, The Enemy’s slowest tune, but it seems Sam loves it. What a great ear he’s developing. The drive back seemed to take for ages, the Sunday drivers were out in force a day early, and we had to head straight to the party instead of going home for 15 minutes as planned.

Kaci’s Party! This was the first party we have been to at Lynnsport, and it was fan-bloody-tastic. The first hour was playtime (only 50 minutes for Sam, sorry little dude) and was in the gymnastics training gym. LOADS of stuff to play on, bounce on, run along, swing on, jump off, you name it! The Daddies were going for it as much as the children. The Mummies wanted to, but didn’t want to look un-cool. I personally loved it, leaping into huge pools of foam blocks is a rare treat when you’re an old giffer. Sam had fun with Sophie - the two of them “squished” me with a huge soft roller - this led to similar “squishings” for Sophie, Poppy, and I am SURE we squished Sam too, but he denies it. Sam was, in general, amazed with the place, and LOVED all the gymnastics equipment. Soon it was time for tea, so everyone adjourned to the food room. I think this, for you blog-readers, was the room in which Dewdrop does her spinning classes. Huge, which means that the acoustics are perfect for screaming children. The kids had a great time, the parents’ ears were shredded. Sam had great fun with an untied balloon, which I had to blow up, then he would let go and chase around. This must have been a great game if you’re 4 or less, as before long there was a group of 5 kids taking turns to chase. One of which was Ryan. Ryan is a bit of a bully, very selfish, and quite aggressive. The best news I heard all day was that his family are emigrating to New Zealand - our gain, Kiwi’s loss, see ya! We eventually headed home. Sam posed in Tom Sharp’s brick bus statue in the Lynnsport car park, then we came home. Bedtime went smoothly, thanks to a new Charlie And Lola bedtime book and the fact that Sam was knackered.

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Wind Power & Flood Bias

Source: Eddie2sox
Friday 27th July 2007, 7:05pm

For a change I'm going to have a rant!

Wind Power

Right now some villagers in Norfolk are opposing the construction of wind turbines near their homes. The government should get tough and build these green sources of power wherever they want. Stick one RIGHT outside my bedroom if you like, I think they look pretty cool. NIMBY idiots get stuffed!

Flood Bias

I am really appalled at the bias in the UK's media when it comes to the current flooding. A month ago huge areas of Yorkshire were flooded, and apart from a footnote in the press, nothing was reported. Now that flooding is affecting or threatening these journo's comfy M4 corridor homes, it is ALL OVER the news, all the time. I live in East Anglia so I'm speaking from an unbiased point of view. Who says there's no north/south divide in England?

Rant over, normal trivial crap will be back tomorrow.

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Quick Meal

Source: Eddie2sox
Friday 27th July 2007, 8:49am

I had this for tea on Thursday night, very quick and tasty....

If you like Greek food try this quick and super-easy meal that I made up yesterday!

You'll need haloumi, tomatoes, cucumber, olives, Greek yoghurt and if you like, garlic sausage or ham. Slice the haloumi, cook it quickly on a griddle-type pan. While that's cooking chop up the tomatoes and cucumber, mix them together with some olive oil and a little bit of balsamic vinegar.

Arrange the slices of haloumi, and between them place tomato and cucmber, and a couple of pieces of meat. Keep repeating that until you finish the "pile" with the last piece of haloumi. Spread any remaining cucmber/tomato around, add a few olives if you like them, and top the whole lot off with some fat free Greek yoghurt.

Lovely!

p.s. not sure what this should be called, "haloumi, tomato and cucumber slightly wonky pile with Greek yoghurt" isn't very catchy is it!

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Great Thursday

Source: Eddie2sox
Thursday 26th July 2007, 9:56pm

Two good days on the bounce.....

Fab day yesterday.

I did quite a lot of work in the flat early on, then headed off to a place called Foulsham for a stroll in the countryside. The weather could have been a bit better, with intermittent drizzle and a gusty breeze, but that is just a minor detail. The very first cow field I had to cross was MUCH wetter than I anticipated, and I had a sinking feeling as one leg disappeared up to the knee in the most foul ordure imaginable. Other leg went in, above the top of my boot. Yuk. So I bounced across the field using the biggest tufts of grass I could, and hoping that none of them would give way. Disgusting things, them cows. The rest of the walk was much drier underfoot, and although not particularly scenic it wasn't unattractive either. One small stream even found enough momentum to have developed a bed of wild cress (pic). Got back to the car after 70 minutes and 4 miles, and had a nice little pickernicker (after carefully removing my crud-encrusted boots). The boots are now in quarantine in the kitchen.

So homeward bound to start a voluntary shift at 2, through to 6. It was a busy afternoon too, but in between calls we managed to answer two emails as well, look at our haloes shining! I spoke to Sam just after 6 and he told me about the open day at RAF Marham that he'd been to, which sounded WET! I told him about the cow pooh/boots/jeans incident which he found hilariously funny. Sam's mummy later sent me some pics of the day, including one of the bloke she left me for. Well, that sure brightened my day up further, the guy still has his crazy bouffant hair-do and REALLY non-existant dress sense. Weird how she preferred him to stylish, caring, funny, cool old me, but there you go, life eh!

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Bawsey Lakes, Meatloaf, And Flippin' Captain Farty Pants!

Source: Eddie2sox
Wednesday 25th July 2007, 7:27pm

Picked Sam up at half twelve, and a good (but soggy) time was had by all....

I loaded the boot with outdoor stuff for our excursion to Bawsey Lakes, about 3 miles outside KL on the way to Gayton. As usual we missed the turn and drove round the countryside admiring the view for a while. Eventually got parked - and there was no ice cream van DAMMIT! We wandered off in search of the lake, and discovered that Bawsey Lakes is actually a pretty good place. The paths, for a start, are sand. Seaside sand, like at the seaside. Weird. And the seaside sand comes in a variety of colours and shades. Filed away in the memory bank is the fact that there are LOADS of decent slopes, which will be perfect for us to go skidding down on the Kidskid if and when it ever snows again.

Sam announced he needed a wee so we dashed into the bushes and "watered" a tree, much to Sam's amusement. Then we hiked up another hillock and there was The Lake, and it looked reet gorgeous. It has a BEACH! A proper, sandy beach (which explains the paths I suppose), and we moaned about the weather not being warm enough to use the beach in the way that Mother Nature intended - ice creams, paddling, sandcastles, and crabs. Well, maybe the crabs is just a Daddy experience so far. Well, we took a few pics with the trusty phone camera, and agreed we would DEFFO be back on a day when the weather is a bit more amenable to summer frolics.

At this point the heavens opened so we beat a hasty retreat back to the car, and then home. Bawsey Lakes - like it - one for the future.

Back home I "had" planned to involve Sam in the making of Turkey Meatloaf, but after peeling and finely chopping the onions my eyeballs were in such a state that I postponed the meatloaf to the evening. Sam didn't mind, but asked what meatloaf was. Do you think describing it as "as tasty as a massive sausage, but with more meat in, and as big as a small loaf of bread". Ladies, I'm looking for your opinions on massive meaty sausages. Meatloaf shelved we set about some serious playing all afternoon, which is both tiring and exhilerating at the same time.

So to bathtime. Another race resulted in another win for Roary The Dolphin. Things went to plan, Sam's hair got washed, and then. And then Flipping Captain Farty Pants made his grand entrance. Last night we filled Captain FP with water to make bigger splashes - and we (well....I) forgot to empty him again. Halfway through bathtime the Mateymen tower collapsed, FP had been at the top, and when he hit the water he launched a tidal wave over poor old Daddy. I was very nearly as wet as Sam. We had the usual moment's shocked silence, then the usual uncontrollable laughter, complete with a pretend-distraught Daddy running round the flat yelling "I'm soaked, I'm sooooooaked" in a passable impersonation of Dad's Army's Fraser saying "We're doooomed". Sam liked it anyway.

What a fab day. Productive morning, super afternoon with my son. And cooking meatloaf tonight!

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These Boots Were Made For Walking

Source: Eddie2sox
Wednesday 25th July 2007, 11:26am

Great day so far, and I'm picking Sam up at half past twelve, so it could get even better!

I've had a productive day so far!

Up at seven (seems like a lie-in) and into the washing up, which is now all done but for one item that I couldn't fit on the draining board. Cleaned the windows, although admittedly we only have about eight - they're all smeary now so they'll need a proper go soon. Cleaned the bathroom top to bottom, except the floor - found I have lost my mop bucket. How do you lose a flipping bucket? Entered a couple of competitions to win tickets in the local rag. Next job is to put the washing away out of the dryer.

At 10 I headed out for a walk for an hour, starting by going to have a look at the allotment site that I am now on the waiting list for. Yup, it's allotments all right! Found the bridge in the picture, how nice is that, tucked so far off the beaten track. From there I went around Loke Road, Columbia, through Discovery Park (I wonder what that place was originally planned to become?) and past Lynnsport, along Swan Lane onto Wootton Road and turned left. Walked away from town as far as Queen Elizabeth Avenue, crossed over using the crossing there then came back home - via Tesco where I obtained another bucket! Left the flat at 9.59, got back at 11.01, so a decent walk in my walking boots.

Oh yes, the walking boots. Well starting tomorrow I intend getting back out into the countryside again, I did it a lot last autumn and winter and it was a winner on all fronts, good exercise, nice scenery, and when the weather was foul, a lovely relief to get back home into the warm again. So, today I dug out the boots to soften them up a bit before heading into the wilds of Norfolk tomorrow (well, Foulsham, it's not THAT wild really). I'll have to be out quite early as I'm doing my second voluntary shift of the day from 2 until 6 pm, so I need to be leaving Foulsham about 1-ish.

This afternoon I pick up Sam at half twelve and we're going off to Bawsey Lakes to have a look round and taking some of Sam's outside games with us. And a football of course! Hopefully when we get back we will be in time to see Skunk-Fu, our new favourite show. It's an easy tea (ham sandwiches) as Sam's mummy is giving him his dinner at their place, so we ought to have loads of time for fun in between bath and food.

So, today's been pretty good so far.......let's hope it keeps that way.

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Greens, Bright Greens And Wee Willie Winkies!

Source: Eddie2sox
Monday 23rd July 2007, 4:05pm

On allotments, prescriptions, motor racing, shopping and beautiful trees....

A right random assortment of topics this after noon ladies and gentlemen!

Allotments

I am going all Good Life and have my name on the waiting list for an allotment at the Old Gala Field in King's Lynn. I contacted the council about it, and was amazed by the rapid reply - less than three hours! The allotments cost less than £20 a year to rent, and seem to represent great value for money. The site I am interested in is run by it's own little Council Of Gardeners, or some such, and therefore more secure and better maintained than the general council sites. I spoke to the man in charge earlier, Mister Sid Link, and I should have control of a plot before the end of the year, yay! Sid told me that this year's weather hasn't helped the allotmenteers, most of the potato crops have suffered blight, but he has had LOTS of lovely cabbage, peas and onions! I am really looking forward to it. The year before my marriage broke down I started looking after our garden properly, growing flowers and lots of veg, and it was looking lovely and going great. Sadly when it all when pete tong I lost interest and it all went to pot. Never mind, I am hoping the allotment will provide a focus for spare time, lots of healthy exercise and fresh air, and lots of home-grown veg!

Prescriptions

Bimbled into town earlier to pick up two prescriptions. One to help blood pressure, the other to reduce the interest in alcohol. Dropped it in at Boots - "can you give us about 15 minutes please?" - sure I can. I wandered round the corner to The Globe for a pint and a read of the paper. I think this is one of them things where opposite things happen, can't remember what the word is! However, saw Les The Duck, Tony, Tattoo Mark in The Globe, all WELL on their way to FUBAR-ness, and it was noon. Made me feel a lot better about myself anyway.

German Grand Prix

I watched another GP yesterday, and it was fan-bloody-tastic! Thanks to the unpredictably rainy weather all the cars and teams were constantly trying to select the right tyres. At the first corner, after a torrential downpour, SIX cars slid off the track inside a minute. Lewis Hamilton (this year's BBC Sports Personality Of The Year, trust me) was one of them, but he kept his engine running and got hoisted back onto the track by a crane. A bloke called Winkelhoff, in a crap car called Go-Kart I think, started the race from the pits BUT on wet weather tyres, and he was pretty soon in the lead as everyone else slithered around - in the wet weather the Formula One cars can't even keep up with the safety car. It was such an entertaining race, I wish they could all be like that.

Shopping

I went to do the weekly shopping today. I had a voucher for £2 off if you spend £20 or more. Well, adding my shopping up in my head, including "guesstimating" the loose fruit and veg, I reached checkout and the total was......£20.34. Damn I'm good! Got food for the rest of the week now, which is quite comforting. One of the things I bought was a pack of Wee Willie Winkies - if you didn't know these are tiny skinless pork sausages, which I have split into 5 sausage bags and chucked into the freezer. Sam loves these, although they're not particularly healthy, HOWEVER! When Sam has WWW's for his tea it is a clever subterfuge by Daddy to make him eat loads of healthy stuff that is piled on his plate alongside the sausages. It's a play-off really, distract him with a small amount of unhealthy, but look on smugly as the good stuff is gobbled up at the same time.

As a side note on the Wee Willie Winkie front, you are supposed to get 20 in a pack - I got 22! So I am about to write a letter to the manufacturer thanking them for their generosity, and playing up how much Sam LOVES their product. Will they give us some free bangers? Watch this space.....

And Finally - Bright Green Tree!

Have a look at the gorgeous colour of the tree in the picture at the top of this blog. We are so lucky to have beautiful sights like this provided for us by Mother Nature. I've been admiring this particular tree, and sometimes stopping and looking for a few minutes, because the colour is absolutely stunning.

Signed, painted picture from Sam for the first person who can tell me exactly where this tree is!

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Crap Parking League XVII

Source: Eddie2sox
Monday 23rd July 2007, 10:06am

Thanks to IMM's lovely Dewdrop for sending me this picture!

Pesky Minis eh? So tricky to fit inside those ridiculously close-together white lines. Seriously, what possible excuse could this driver have? I guess the Mini on the right is owned by a man, and the orange one belongs to his missus....

Table:

New Shape Mini.....4

Vauxhall Corsa.....3

Honda Civic.....2

VW Bora.....1.5

Vauxhall Vectra.....1.5

Vauxhall Combo van.....1

VW Golf.....1

Peugeot 206.....1

Mystery Rover.....1

Huge Green American Monstrosity.....1

Ford Focus.....1

Original Mini.....1

Send me any pics of bad parking you collect to trix68@hotmail.co.uk

Andwhy not peruse the Net's best bad parking website at: http://www.crap-parking.co.uk/index.php?mode=home

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Crap Parking League XVI

Source: Eddie2sox
Monday 23rd July 2007, 8:38am

This one's a ripper!

Take a look at this picture. This Corsa's right side wheels are on a "Don't drive on this bit" area. The left wheels are on the road, directly in front of the main doors of the supermarket. The driver seems to have made no attempt whatsoever to park! Dreadful. The end result is that Corsa is challenging the new shape Mini at the top of the table....

Table:

New Shape Mini.....4

Vauxhall Corsa.....3

Honda Civic.....2

VW Bora.....1.5

Vauxhall Vectra.....1.5

Vauxhall Combo van.....1

VW Golf.....1

Peugeot 206.....1

Mystery Rover.....1

Huge Green American Monstrosity.....1

Ford Focus.....1

Send me any pics of bad parking you collect to trix68@hotmail.co.uk

Andwhy not peruse the Net's best bad parking website at: http://www.crap-parking.co.uk/index.php?mode=home

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H, D, C, S and V Are The Initials Of Characters Who Die!

Source: Eddie2sox
Monday 23rd July 2007, 7:45am

In the new Harry Potter book.....full names at the bottom of the page....

I have to say I am amazed at the ridiculous hype surrounding the Harry Potter book. It's a children's story for goodness sake! And why did parents allow their kids to be up at midnight just to buy a novel?

The writer has set herself up nicely for a whole new series of books, as Harry's kids plus those of Ron and Hermione and Malfoy, go to Hogwarts school. Look out for "James Potter And The Re-Hashed Claptrap" as part one of seven.

My advice is save yourself a few quid, several days reading, and check out the story here.

Good luck to her, I guess it's kept her above the breadline. Mind you, I think claiming that she has worked harder than Charles Dickens is a little on the arrogant side...."Try 17 years Charles"!

The characters who turn their toes up are: Hedwig, Dobby, Crabbe, Snape and Voldemort. Who the chuff THEY might be I have no idea!

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It's A Washout!

Source: Eddie2sox
Sunday 22nd July 2007, 9:38am

Yesterday Sam and his Daddy set out to enjoy the nearest World Championship to take place to where we live......but it was called off because of the rain....

But more of that later. The "leaver's party" at Sam's nursery was good fun on Friday afternoon, he danced around with his little buddies, then we headed home. Tea was the old favourite "chip butty night", which he hasn't had since June 15th, and he really enjoyed his chips and sausage and two slices of b&b. In the chip shop (Denny's, near Gaywood Tesco) the lady behind the counter was as barking mad as always. She'd run out of lollies though, so she promised to give Sam TWO next time he visited. Sam was looking good sitting on my shoulders, and all the women who came into the shop were ooohing and aaaahing at him. He's a complete ***** magnet, at the age of 4!

Just before the chippy we'd been to the doc's for a routine visit for me, and even in the waiting room there were women admiring my little boy. The doc told me off, gave me repeat prescriptions, and we were off.....

After tea it was bathtime, and we had a new competitor in the Bathtime Swimming Races. We'd popped into Tesco to pick up a new swimmer for the bath, there's a set of about 5 various sea creatures which run on batteries and have a propellor at the back which sends them through the water at various speeds. This week we managed to find a replacement for our eel, the previous version died a death. So, in a close contest between Roary The Dolphin, Maxy The Beaver, and CeeCee The Eel, Roary once again came out on top. Bedtime was nice, Sam was pretty tired after his party exertions, and that was the end of Friday.

Saturday dawned rainy and grey but that never stops us doing anything! Our Saturday morning was quiet but a lot of fun, we did some building, Sam painted a picture for me, and we made the fishcakes that I described in the previous blog. We decided to take a walk into town to get some fresh air, so I kitted Sam out in wellies, coat and rolled up trousers so he could go out and do the stuff little boys should do, involving mud, puddles, sticks etc. We found another long piece of old clay pipe in The Walks and headed home for some sandwiches before we set out on our afternoon adventure....

Which was to see The World Snail Racing Championship at Congham! It didn't take long to get there, but we couldn't find the venue.....not many people and cars around either. We decided to drive around searching for the great event, and spent 40 minutes hunting....Sam occasionally yelled "A-HA!" and pointed at a likely looking bunch of parked cars, all turned out to be false alarms though. We eventually returned to where we started the search and found a few bedraggled people gathered - the snail racing fraternity! Unfortunately, despite the weather being perfect for the snails, it had waterlogged the field where the Championships were to take place. Sam was distraught and there were many tears and "But I WANT to see the snail racing Daddy" outbursts, but I guess that's only to be expected in the circumstances.

We stopped at a shop for ice cream on the way home, and we had a couple of "bonus" hours of play, silver lining! We went out the back of the flats to play football, golf and frisbee, Sam kept scooting up the fire escape to watch passing trains, and we had a LOAD of fun on the soaking grass. Sam caught me a cracker in the testicle department with a golf club, I accidentally hit him with a golf shot too, but it didn't matter. Sam also triped over his wellies and fell face-first into the grass, standing up he looked like he had been spray painted with that fake green grass material you see on market stalls. After spitting out the grass in his mouth he laughed though.

Bathtime was great, Sam had FISHCAKES, and veg for his tea, and all too soon it was time to go back. I'd texted Sam's mummy to warn her NOT to mention the snail racing, and she rang Sam to ask him if he wanted to help make a cake when he got back. So for once we both got our act together to make Sam's Saturday evening much less of a drama. On the way home we played, and sang along with, "Away From Here" by The Enemy, including yelling as loud as we could whenever the live "To stay at home with RICHARD AND JUDY" came around.

And that was that!

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Easy Salmon Fishcakes

Source: Eddie2sox
Sunday 22nd July 2007, 9:17am

Sam loves fishcakes from the chippy, but they must have some dodgy e-numbers etc in them? So yesterday we made these fishcakes, the recipe is by Annabel Karmel....

Ingredients

420g can pink salmon

5 tbsp spring onion, finely chopped

5 tbsp tomato ketchup

150g white breadcrumbs

salt and ground black pepper

50g plain flour

2 eggs, lightly beaten

4 tbsp vegetable oil

Method

1. Drain the salmon and flake it, checking for and removing any large bones.

2. In a mixing bowl, combine the salmon, spring onions, tomato ketchup, one third of the breadcrumbs, and a little bit of salt and pepper.

3. Form the mixture into fishcakes and coat first in flour, then beaten egg and then breadcrumbs.

4. Heat the oil in a frying pan and saute the fishcakes for about 2 minutes each side, or until golden.

The Verdict

Sam initially tried a piece and screwed his face up and said "YUCK"! However, he's done this before and I was convinced it was because it is a new taste, not a nasty one. So I insisted he chewed and swallowed another piece, which he did, and when he'd finished the whole plateful he changed his verdict from "Yuck" to "Yum!" I tasted them myself and I wouldn't have been too disappointed if Sam had rejected them, these fishcakes are delicious!

Notes

The original recipe says to use red salmon, but the pink salmon is cheaper and worked just as well. If you use the amounts described above you will make 8 fishcakes, but they are suitable for freezing, and Sam now has another six in our freezer ready for another day. Yum! As always, the picture with this recipe is of my own finished version.

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There's Always Someone Worse Off....

Source: Eddie2sox
Thursday 19th July 2007, 9:38pm

I did my voluntary shift today. And there are people so much worse off than me right now. And worse off than you too. And you. And you too. And YOU THERE, sneaking out at the back....

I got all emotional after my shift, one caller really made me count my blessings. It's true you know, there is ALWAYS somebody worse off than you.

I had a good day today, cooked a LOAD of pasta sauce for Sam which will last for a couple of months. I got our long-reach stapler off E-Bay, which both me and Sam are looking forward to using to start The Scrapbook. Put in a good shift on the voluntary stuff.

Finishing my day eating pizza and watching Big Brother.....I desperately hate Charley but she has to be kept in cos of the entertainment factor. Plus it will be crueller to kick her out nearer the end.

Tomorrow is the last day Sam will be at nursery. There's a party there from 1 til4 for "the leavers". It's so sad. No more happy hellos from the fantastic staff there. I will really miss Sam's best mate/carer Shellie, she is such a babemungous cute chick, BUT fantastic with my son too. Thanks Shellie. Amy's a hot carer chick too. I'm gonna miss rolling up there with the music blasting and the staff looking out knowing it's Sam's Daddy.

Everyone at Twinkletots, I think I can mention you now Sam is leaving....you are ALL FANTASTIC. Thanks so much for looking after my special little boy so well. And anyone reading, who needs pre-school childcare - TWINKLETOTS, KING'S LYNN. The best nursery in the UK, by a mile.

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IMM Sunday League Football Team

Source: Eddie2sox
Thursday 19th July 2007, 7:01am

It's been a while since I made a progress report on my Sunday League footie team Rovers Return Rovers......

.....but they're still going and heading for the play-offs in their division this season. Well, now it's time for us IMM bloggers to get fit - virtually of course.

I'm going to start another team, made up entirely of us lot here at IMM. Team name for a start will be It's My Market Bloggers. If you want to "bagsy" a specific position in the team leave a comment and I'll see what I can do. Me, I'll be claiming a place in the centre of midfield.

This will be a free team with no extra investment (unless IMM cough up a bob or two for us to recruit better players), so we should have two or three super successful seasons before things get tougher and lack of investment starts to hamper our progress.

Remember, let me know where you want to play in the team! The sooner you ask the better your player will be, as I'll name the better players first....

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King's Lynn 0 Norwich 4

Source: Eddie2sox
Wednesday 18th July 2007, 10:20pm

I went out and did something!

Well, it was a toss up between staying in to watch Corrie and swig some beer, or go to watch a game of football. The football cost a fiver and I enjoyed it, so that was a fiver well spent. It's a sign I;m not getting younger, one ball came fizzing over the bar, I jumped to whack it and my little finger got bent backwards, OOOOOHYABUGGA! Hopefully it's just badly bruised, if it's the size of Dion Dublin's wedding tackle tomorrow then I'll be off to the QEH. The game itself was amusing, King's Lynn did better than I thought they would, Norwich took advantage when the home team ran out of steam, and scored 3 of their 4 goals in the last 10 minutes. It appears Jack Defty's arse has had a very lazy summer, and has returned for pre-season twice the size it was even in May. Unbelievable I know, but true!

Still generally in "head under the duvet" mode, but having Sam yesterday and today is a real boost, even when the first thing he says is "I'm in rather a grumpy mood today Daddy!"

Tomorrow I am "planning" to be cooking all morning, another biiiiig batch of the hidden veg pasta sauce that Sam devours, and some nice fishcakes that are healthier than shop ones. In the afternoon I'm doing a voluntary shift, then I may stick my head back under the duvet again.

Anyway, rumours of me doing anything stupid are MILES off the mark, I am NOT leaving Sam on his own!

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Depression!

Source: Eddie2sox
Monday 16th July 2007, 5:47am

Well it's got a proper hold again, fantastic.

Which means letting people down and making myself physically ill through too much alcohol, the wrong foods, and no exercise (can't be arsed).

I can't face work today so I'll be letting them know later. So probably be out of a job there and wouldn't blame them, you can't rely on the unreliable.

Paul, I'd like to postpone what we arranged for later please?

Anyone else who reads this secretly, don't worry cos things will sort themselves out eventually, but don't involve me in any plans right now OK?

I know "what" I should be doing, but any tips on the "how" to do it would be useful, thanks.

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But apart from that....

Source: Eddie2sox
Sunday 15th July 2007, 7:07pm

Everything is rubbish!

And that's why I haven't been blogging much recently.

Lots of "oh I am sooooo crap" doesn't make good reading, so I'd rather keep schtum!

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Good Weekend.....Rest Of My Life? Shove It!

Source: Eddie2sox
Sunday 15th July 2007, 6:47pm

I had a good time with Sam this weekend, but I am completely fed up with life in every other respect....

So the weekend. Sam was ill with a bug from nursery, so we decided to delay me picking him up til Saturday dinner time. We had a LOT of fun despite the still weird weather.

Saturday afternoon we went exploring the Walks park and found a new bit (for Sam anyway, but shhhhhhhh). We also found ome more seashells which Sam thought the builders must go to Hunstanton to collect then bring back. It's not easy explaining that King's Lynn was underwater when the dinosaurs were alive. "Did dinosaurs eat fish Daddy?" Yeah mate, some dinosaurs ate fish! We brought home some nice new shells that we found - unearthed by The Walks redevelopment - and cleaned them up, lovely.

After exploring we went to "the park". All that is left is 3 grown-up swings, but Sam wanted to go anyway. He's 4 now after all! We were on the swings for nearly an hour! What a fantastic, carefree, lovely time it was. We sang songs (occasionally to the amusement of the seated, drinking boozers I think), empowered the dragon (if you know, you know, if you don't, you suck), got scary, and it was absolutely brilliant. As Sam's daddy, I feel especially proud when me and Sam are completely rolling laughing at something, then I happen to look at the path going past and there are a few people looking with that "look at those people having fun" kind of look. I also feel immediately embarrassed. But what fun!

Sam was still not 100% and didn't want a big tea, so he had ham sandwich, melon, crispy cake - hey, that sounds like a decent tea! But he wasn't scoffing like usual.

Bedtime was so sweet. Sam was very tired and was sort of slurring when he was saying "I love you Daddy" and "I love my farmyard" but that is so cool. He was asleep quite quick probably because of his last few days being poorly.

Sam appeared in my bed at 2:08 am this morning. Annoyed? Are you kidding! I love it. We cuddled in and slept for a few more hours. Well, Sam did, I woke up a LOT as usual, but I don't mind that, it's worth it. Like I said recently, I have to make the very best of Sam wanting to kip with his Daddy, it won't last for long.

When we finally got up at 6 we were straight into play-mode! We had a BRILLIANT morning playing, eating and watching telly. We arranged a massive car race at the electric track, complete with clear-up tractors and helicopter casualty evacuation. That race was very eventful, won by Dodge second was Leakless, third was Number Ten (see pic).

Then the whole thing moved to the next venue, a la F1. This being the living room floor. It's posts like this I wish I could post more pics per post, cos 3 or 4 would better describe this post's events. At the second race Wingo embarrassed himself (no pic available) and there was even more crashing, oh dear.

Back to mum time came and Sam was really mopey for the last half hour. Not sure if it was because he was having an aftershock from his illness or being sad going away from Daddy.

But we're back together on Tuesday! I love my Sam. Sam told me that he loved me. Can't be bad.

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Two-Sox Excursion Back On Shocker!

Source: Eddie2sox
Wednesday 11th July 2007, 8:37pm

Well I'll probably regret it next week but I've decided to "sub" myself a little money to have a day trip tomorrow....

Which effectively means robbing Peter to pay Paul, until payday. But as the advert says "I'm worth it" - yeah right course I am. Anyway, I was going to head to the seaside but instead I'm off to have a proper look around Wisbech, never really taken any time there. Tomorrow is market day, and I want to have a close up, leisurely look at the Georgian buildings along the river. And of course read the paper in a bustling marketside pub!

Sam Stuff

Sam's been round for tea and bath the last two afternoons, needless to say a damn good time was had by all (well, both actually). Tonight we were going to press on with the Ferrari build, but it was blustery outside and I didn't really want either of us to end up covered head to foot in scarlet spray-paint. Two of Sam's mates at nursery had to go home today after starting to throw up everywhere, and Sam said he didn't feel well - he turned out to be absolutely fine though as he piled away one of the biggest teas I've ever seen him eat. He helped make some of it too.

On the Ferrari front, we need to get cracking! Today I agreed a sponsorship deal with The Woodmans Cottage pub - well, Oberst Keinhaar the landlord donated some HUGE bubblewrap for us to use inside the car, and also the exhaust pipes are fresh from the toilet roll holders there too.....next step is to look at some pics of this year's F1 Ferrari online, note down the sponsors, and send a charming letter to each of them asking for a sticker or two to adorn our home-made creation. Doubt we'll ever hear anything but it will add more fun to the project for Sam.

Job Stuff

Still no missed call from Stella Artois about the tasting job. However, I think I am maybe settling on a way forward. So I didn't get accepted for the mental health nursing. What do I want from a career?

- to help people (sounds a bit twee, but hey!)

- to enjoy what I do

- if possible, have some say in the hours I work

So, a friend whose sister is a nanny, said something like "Bearing those things in mind, and also that you like time with Sam, what about being a manny"? And I like the idea. I've been on the phone to a few places and lots of info about nannying as a career should be popping through the letter box any time. Not a very macho thing to do, but I guess I did 21 years in the military to get that out of my system.

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Lottery Win Please!

Source: Eddie2sox
Tuesday 10th July 2007, 7:37pm

Right, it's come to pass that I may have to give up some time with Sam during the week to find a job that pays the bills....

Obviously this is the last thing I want, and I have been looking high and low for work that fits in with my current arrangements. No luck though, and now I really have to reach a situation where my income is greater than the outgoings.

This month for example I still have to earn £357 to break even, and that doesn't include luxuries like food and petrol! Well, when I say £357, that really means £410+ as 15% of everything I earn is paid to Sam's mummy. I think this month will be another one with the balance in the red, considerably, before payday rolls around.

It's sad but I may have to give up my Tuesday and Wednesday afternoons with Sam, or cut them back drastically. Would it be fair on Sam to pick him up from nursery at quarter past five and have to have him back with his mummy by half past six? Probably not, and the selfish side of me says go for it anyway. However, the caring daddy side knows that it's what is best for Sam that is by far the most important factor. One hour "flying visits" comprising bath and tea and nothing else probably don't fall into that category.

So. I'm in the market for fulltime work, Monday to Friday. Let me know if you hear of anything please?

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Crap Parking League XV

Source: Eddie2sox
Tuesday 10th July 2007, 5:36am

OK, OK, stop nagging! I was saving this pic for a rainy day, but due to pressure from the contributor, here it is!

Another guest offering, spotted near the Oasis Centre at sunny Hunstanton. I'm just amazed it's taken the chicks' favourite car, the Ford Focus, so long to make an appearance....

Table:

New Shape Mini.....4

Vauxhall Corsa.....2

Honda Civic.....2

VW Bora.....1.5

Vauxhall Vectra.....1.5

Vauxhall Combo van.....1

VW Golf.....1

Peugeot 206.....1

Mystery Rover.....1

Huge Green American Monstrosity.....1

Ford Focus.....1

Send me any pics of bad parking you collect to trix68@hotmail.co.uk

Andwhy not peruse the Net's best bad parking website at: http://www.crap-parking.co.uk/index.php?mode=home

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Crap Parking League XIV

Source: Eddie2sox
Monday 9th July 2007, 8:07pm

Another day, another driver who ought to retake their test....

These Honda Civics are SOOOO tough to park, due to the excessive length. Especially in a deserted part of the car park, where you might bump into someone else......if you overshoot by 40 metres.....

Table:

New Shape Mini.....4

Vauxhall Corsa.....2

Honda Civic.....2

VW Bora.....1.5

Vauxhall Vectra.....1.5

Vauxhall Combo van.....1

VW Golf.....1

Peugeot 206.....1

Mystery Rover.....1

Huge Green American Monstrosity.....1

Send me any pics of bad parking you collect to trix68@hotmail.co.uk

Andwhy not peruse the Net's best bad parking website at: http://www.crap-parking.co.uk/index.php?mode=home

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Dinosaur Park 2

Source: Eddie2sox
Sunday 8th July 2007, 6:38pm

Well, me and Sam had a fantastic time together this weekend....

As I posted a while ago, we received complimentary tickets to visit the Dinosaur Park which is halfway between Norwich and Fakenham. Yesterday we used them and had a really memorable day.

Our main complaint last time was that we didn't have enough time, so we arrived almost immediately after the place opened, and guess what - we still ran out of time. Once again we had so much fun, Sam was the first rider of the day on the Raptor Racers, and had a ton of fun zooming round the track, pretending to make pit stops, and running over his hat (good job his head wasn't in it at the time, a la Brian Harvey eh?). I REALLY recommend this place for a visit if you have kids, it is a fantastic place. You are given a "guide book" when you enter, which you can fill with ink stamps that you might find all around the place - collect them all and you receive a free small toy. We knew this from last time.....but it was still great fun....

This time though we had a little bit extra time to enjoy a few more parts of the Dinosaur Park. We went on the Deer Safari, which was fantastic fun, and we got towed behind a REAL army lorry to see the three types of deer. Sam was a star during the question and answer session, he kept yelling out "helpful" answers, which were often funny, thus making the guide's job a bit easier! We also watched the sheepdog demonstration, with dogs Gwen, Tack, Craig and Jet, and we were amazed how fast the dogs are. The shepherd asked a few questions and again Sam yelled out some answers, mostly helpful (although "What do we make out of wool?"......"SAUSAGES!" raised a laugh). We also found a peacock feather, kindly dropped by the peacock strolling self-importantly around the place - we decided it would be a nice present for Mummy. Despite being in the park for seven hours, Sam still cried when I said it was time to head off home. This weekend was a bonus, cos Sam was sleeping over on a Saturday for a change, so there was no rush home, and that made all the difference.

Anyhow, when we got home Sam had a big tea of spaghetti bol and garlic bread (garlic bread was out of a packet, oh the shame). Then we had a quick bath and a really, really sweet bedtime. Sam was tired but fought it for ages, and I was sitting next to his bed for about half an hour until his eyes finally drooped. I love my little superhero.

Sam jumped in with me at half five this morning, which was ace. Cos we have a lovely cuddle and some nice chatting, before we jump out of bed at six to play and have brekkie. Sam and me decided that we should convert the bottom level of the castle into a dinosaur park, so we cleared it out and installed the "dinosaurs". Bob The Builder was apponted as Park Manager, and he started charging customers £10 per visit! (See pic). First through the doors were Fireman Sam and Tom, and later Red Power Ranger, sadly a couple of pirates had to be refused entry because they hadn't saved up enough money to get in.

We had a last really funny song of Hokey Cokey, with some words changed for raspberries, and then we headed off to Mummy's. Sam's Mum was really cool this weekend, and said that the 9 o'clock return time wasn't a "hard" time, and we could turn up whenever.....so we made it back about twenty to ten. Thanks Sam's Mum.

My Sunday? Watched the British Grand Prix, although I usually think it's boring (and it was). Roasted a chicken - nice dinner AND it will do me for a few more meals this week. And that's it. Very relaxing.

I'm hoping one of my job apps works out soon. This week I got paid, filled the car with petrol, paid 15% maintenance, bought food to last to next Friday, paid maintenance, had fun down the pub (£15). The rest of my pay was to be put in the bank to pay next month's bills. But it wasn't worth paying £7 in really.

Great weekend, roll on another job!

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The End Of Little Boy-ness?

Source: Eddie2sox
Thursday 5th July 2007, 8:05pm

Tonight I went to Sam's school, where he starts in September, for a meet and greet type affair. It's a school, a bloody big, real school!

So now I am on a bit of a downer, my little star is growing up at 100 miles an hour. I now realise it's only a matter of time until these things stop:

- running up to me randomly, arms out, and yelling "Cuddle Daddy"

- coming to sit on my knee for quiet time and to read a book or watch a telly programme together

- jumping into my bed at 5 a.m. for cuddles until the alarm goes off

....it's just not bloody fair! For half his life I have been severely rationed in the time I can spend with him. If you have young kids, and are still living with your partner/wife/boyfriend/whatever and feeling bored with life, then wake up and realise that you are so very lucky! Believe me, when it's gone it hurts.

Bizarrely me and Sam's mummy get on pretty well now, which is obviously great for our son. We're great parents but a crap couple.

Old Friend & Charity Quiz Night

I bumped into a mate I haven't seen in ten years and since being stationed in Germany! Les The Butcher (it's his trade, he's not a serial killer - that I know of anyway) is alive and well and has washed up in King's Lynn! We were mates when we were at Wildenrath in Germany, and used to do the Sunday quiz nights in the NAAFI there. 500ml bottles of Becks for DM1.10 (30p), lovely. Anyhow, tomorrow night in the Fenman pub there is a charity quiz night, so we're teaming up to recreate our dream team and conquer the universe! Maximum is 4 per team so if you are at a loose end tomorrow night we'll see you in the Fenman at about half six, eyes down at half seven. It'll be weird being out on a Friday cos it's my usual Sam night, but this week his mum's out on a hen night on Saturday so he'll be here then instead.

Life Earth Aid Diana Thing

So there's another bland charity concert this weekend. Well they certainly know their target demographic! To attract the cash of the middle classes they use middle of the road bland artists. Fair play to them if it gets some cash in. This awful spectacle has Madonna, Razorlight, Snow Patrol, Pussycat Dolls, Genesis for heaven's sake! How coincidental that Genesis are appearing in the same year they re-unite and put out new material! Plus points might be Kasabian, the Beastie Boys, and a MUST SEE - Spinal Tap, on stage about 7-ish. Any fellow Tapheads will probably tune in just for these boys, performing three songs including the legendary Stonehenge and Warmer Than Hell. Apart from that, give it a miss, put a quid in the charity tin being shaken outside your local supermarket next time you visit. Better still, do something yourself!

Pub Crawl Excursion Type Thing

I've had to postpone next Wednesday's "write it as you go" blog trip due to lack of finances! Any loaded sponsors willing to put their name to this trip please egt in touch!

It's A Beautiful World!

I came over all hippy this morning, and texted my thought for the day to a few mates. So if you didn't get the text, I said that we should take time out today to look at something nice, such as a flower, a river, or the clouds, and appreciate how beautiful the world is. I also said enjoy it while you can, as we'll be gone long before the earth will. I took the pic for this blog near Castle Acre.

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Why Are Sam's Matey Men So Excited Right Now?

Source: Eddie2sox
Wednesday 4th July 2007, 8:02pm

Because they ARRRRRRRRRRRRR!

It turns out that the Mermatey's Mum and Dad named her Keira after Keira Knightley! There's a turn-up for the books. As you can see from the picture she seems to be looking forward to joining the happy band of piratical rapscallions, and this will be happening sooner rather than later as all the bubbles have nearly gone....

Little does she know that Capn's Crazy, Dodgy, Cow, Farty-Pants and Fishy have already secretly christened her "Five-Times Knightley", a rather less attractive name than Keira, BUT probably much more accurate too. How will she deal with all the seamen? Watch this space....

I have to praise Matey's quality too. One little dribble from Five-Times' opening and within seconds there was more frothing, foaming and bubbles than you could shake a stick at.

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A Busy Day, But A Good One

Source: Eddie2sox
Wednesday 4th July 2007, 7:45pm

Bed at 2.30 am, up again just after 5 isn't the best way to get ready for a busy day, but it's nearly over now, hoorah. I can hear the pillow calling my name....

Cleaning at The Woolpack went OK as far as I can remember, that part of the morning is all a bit of a blur to be perfectly honest. Landlord Danny was surprised when the bar stocktaker turned up just as I was leaving, but by then I was in the car splashing towards Wisbech.

The morning at The Woodmans was really busy, with lots of visitors getting in the way of the UK's premier pub cleaner. There was a foxy lady from the press talking about an article about the pub, and blow me down, the same stocktaker from the Woolie earlier followed me into the Woodmans at about 10. The press babe was obviously impressed with the standard of work I produce, as she said it had been "a pleasure to piddle in your toilet, it was spotless". Of course it is! She then offered me a job cleaning her house in Cambridge - but it's spreading the net just too far isn't it. I had to really rush to finish before opening time because I hadn't wanted to hoover while the business discussions were going on, but it all turned out fine.....then back in the car to KL.

Made myself a nice mild curry for dinner, I am going to be avoiding hot spicy food for a while, and researched some info about balloon races and balloon releases for next year. Then zoomed off to pick up Sam from Twinkletots nursery.

We had a game of football outside before heading indoors to play with Lego, bin lorries, cars and stickers. Sam had a big tea, then we watched two really funny episodes of Shaun The Sheep (especially loved the one with the bees, hiding the jam sandwich in Shirley's wool made Sam laugh til he was red in the face). Bathtime was cool, and then it was time to depart, BOOOOOOO! Sam said he wanted to stay here forever, probably because he had just started rebuilding his Lego bin lorry....

And now home. Going to peruse some mindless TV then head to bed about 9, BLISS!

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Crap Parking League XIII

Source: Eddie2sox
Wednesday 4th July 2007, 7:13pm

Another contribution via email, this time from fellow blogger Letty!

Thing is, once again, I have absolutely NO IDEA what kind of car this is.......so until I hear different it will be filed under Huge Green American Monstrosity. Also still waiting on the exact identity of the Mystery Rover....

Table:

New Shape Mini.....4

Vauxhall Corsa.....2

VW Bora.....1.5

Vauxhall Vectra.....1.5

Honda Civic.....1

Vauxhall Combo van.....1

VW Golf.....1

Peugeot 206.....1

Mystery Rover.....1

Huge Green American Monstrosity.....1

Send me any pics of bad parking you collect to trix68@hotmail.co.uk

Andwhy not peruse the Net's best bad parking website at: http://www.crap-parking.co.uk/index.php?mode=home

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When Can I Sleep Please? Oh, And More About The Whales....

Source: Eddie2sox
Tuesday 3rd July 2007, 8:59pm

I am in love......with my bed. And as absence makes the heart grow fonder, by this time tomorrow I will be completely besotted.....

When I created maintenance plans for fleets of helicopters, and by some fluke it worked out just according to prediction, we used to say "It's not good luck, it's good planning". We used to say that a lot actually, because our plans were the bees-knees. And to pinch a phrase from golfing legend Arnold Palmer (ask yer dad), "It's a funny thing, the more I practice the luckier I get." Aye, them were reet good plans tha knows.

Actually, departing on a tangent, I want to mention a little more about my time as Support Helicopter Fleet Planner (wooooooo!). One of my best achievements during 21 years in the RAF was the production of the fleet plan for the newly-introduced Merlin helicopters. We'd known they were coming for a while, but it was a shock one Friday when our boss said "We need the fleet plan by Wednesday, we're getting 22 Merlins, get cracking." O.....K..... No other information was available, no delivery dates, no maintenance details such as how long each servicing would take, what flying hour intervals they would be carried out at, nothing. So me and my corporal (there were only 2 of us in Fleet Planning at the time, this was expanded to 6 later when the size of the task became clearer) got to work, and had a passable first draft done by Monday. We had to make up SO MUCH stuff, that to cover our asses we called the second page of the plan "Assumptions" and listed all the factors we had basically guessed at. Anyway, the point being, that several of our assumptions are STILL in the plan, 6 years and a ton of factual data later. It's true, if you say something often enough, and with enough conviction, it becomes a FACT. It's not good luck, it's good planning.

So, right now, I can only describe my life as "It's not bad luck, it's bad planning". Today started at 5.05 am, got home from cleaning and a brief excursion into town (Yes Mister Natwest, I KNOW I'm broke), picked Sam up at half three, took him back at half six. Straight to Samaritans committee meeting which lasted to just about 8, and now I'm waiting to start a nightshift there from 10 tonight until 2 tomorrow morning.......and THEN up at 5.05 again for cleaning! I'm looking forward to seeing Sam again tomorrow afternoon but I also have to admit I cannot bloody wait to hit the hay tomorrow, probably about 8 o'clock! Bad planning. Got loads of stuff on for the rest of the week too so I have to make the most of tomorrow night for sleep. Sad news that my alcohol counsellor has personal life problems and is off until the end of July. I feel very sorry for him as he's a lovely bloke. I am also worried how I am going to keep to the twice a week drinking for a month with no support. I just have to do it.

And so to the whales. I was discussing it with Obersturmbahnfuhrer Keinhaar this morning, who thought it was a good idea but what would I do with all the whales? I suggested landfill, but that would smell, so I came up with the perfect solution - Ebay! You'd probably get a few quid per whale, but you'd have to include the clause "buyer pays postage" or you'd be on a loser. It would need a lot of bubble wrap too. Alternatively I plan to hijack the "Say It With Flowers" ad campaign, and instead promote "Say It With A Whale". The ideal way to express heartfelt sentiments in a memorable way, you tell us the message and species of whale you want, we'll stencil your words on the whale's back and deliver it in person. If this doesn't appeal, feel free to try my Whale In The Mail offer. OSBF Ribbands came up with a different way to reduce the sea level - scrape a metre from the bottom of all water masses around the globe and deposit the scrapings in scantly inhabited crapholes, such as Greenland, The Outback, or Wisbech.

The Kyoto Treaty took weeks to work out, and still isn't working, yet we solved a MAJOR environmental problem in a matter of minutes. Just call me Eddie Green Sox!

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Health, Employment, Relationships.....Whales?

Source: Eddie2sox
Monday 2nd July 2007, 12:49pm

I need to make some major decisions in some big areas of life!

Health-wise I am in a kind of crappy area, and now the doctor says I have gastritis! It's inflammation of the stomach lining due to eating and drinking the wrong things, and it's exacerbated by stress. He reckons I have taken my eye off the ball diet-wise since hearing about the nursing course rejection, and I think he's right. So I have two prescriptions to help sort things out, but it has to be mainly my own efforts in eating and drinking better foods that will help. Gastritis can turn into a stomach ulcer and we don't want that do we!

Employment-wise I need to get my head straightened out, and sooner rather than later. I am now at the limit of my finances so I have to get more work from somewhere. Several interesting jobs in the Lynn News so I will be applying for posts again. I like doing the pub cleaning but I don't want to be doing it forever. So. I need to think long-term too. Do I just tread water doing cleaning and other small jobs for a year and then try to get into nursing again? If I get rejected again I'll have wasted another year. Or should I forget the nursing completely and look for a "proper" job, full time, that will pay the bills?

Relationships-wise, well, what a minefield! Every day I have a different outlook on where I want to go. I am pretty happy on my own, as I can do what I want, when I want. But then I feel lonely and miss the company of a special woman in my life. I have subconciously built massive barriers around myself and the thought of letting them down to let someone get close is terrifying. Mainly because of past history, I am almost certain that the next woman would do exactly what the others have done. So, what do I do? Another subject that I need to get my head round!

Having said all this, right now I am fairly happy in my life! Please don't take the impression that I'm whinging, life is pretty good! And from the voluntary stuff I do, I KNOW there are many people in much worse situations than me.

So....about the whales? It was just a suggestion I made to the Grumpy Old Men's Club in the Woolpack. Lots of flooding around at the moment, surely the water levels must be too high? And so I think that we MUST slaughter every single whale in our seas and oceans. Whales take up a LOT of room, so removing them from the global bath-tub would see the water levels drop, and flooding would be less likely.

Save The Planet - Obliterate A Whale!

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Crap Parking League XII

Source: Eddie2sox
Monday 2nd July 2007, 11:17am

There's always one....

And this one demonstrates an almost perfect "centre straddle" technique (actually sounds like page 112 of the Kama Sutra). Corsa are indeed putting the fun back into terrible parking.

Table:

New Shape Mini.....4

Vauxhall Corsa.....2

VW Bora.....1.5

Vauxhall Vectra.....1.5

Honda Civic.....1

Vauxhall Combo van.....1

VW Golf.....1

Peugeot 206.....1

Mystery Rover.....1

Send me any pics of bad parking you collect to trix68@hotmail.co.uk

Andwhy not peruse the Net's best bad parking website at: http://www.crap-parking.co.uk/index.php?mode=home The kind owner of this site has included a link to this very blog, what a gent!

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Billy Smart's Circus!

Source: Eddie2sox
Sunday 1st July 2007, 4:03pm

Sam's first visit to a circus, and his Daddy's diverse, random thoughts at the moment

Billy Smart's Circus

I got hold of some half price vouchers for the circus, and after checking with Mummy that they weren't going (no, it's after Sam's bedtime) we got some nice tickets, not ringside (you get picked out and have to join in) but next best, and saved ourselves a bob or two. Well, we drove to West Winch where the circus was pitched, and it was quite magical! Sam wouldn't have appreciated all the "extra" stuff, especially the fact that everyone was dressed up to the nines, the bloke checking tickets on the outside gate, people selling toys, everyone, it was lovely. The circus was excellent entertainment, lots of "death-defying" people on ropes/ hanging cloths etc. A girl juggled with her feet, culminating in an attempt to juggle a football up a balanced "stairway" and into a basket at the top - needless to say she failed first time, DOH! So she got off the table and won the sympathy vote for the audience to ask her to try again.....and she hit the basket, yay, what a surprise!

The clowns were great, main clown was a Mexican guy called Chico Rico, he was ace. Sam liked him, I LOVED him (sad admission). The other clown was dressed as a fireman, who rushed into the ring looking for a fire - but it was his helmet that was ablaze, zoinks. His routine involved squirting his hose over the audience by accident, and his great revolving ladder, which inevitably kept whacking him in the face, between the legs etc, top stuff.

The trapeze group were fecking awesome, they had me scared, god knows how their sphincters were bearing up. At "that" end of the big top, on their really high runs, they were actually crashing into the fabric of the tent. So fast, so many twists and somersaults going on, for me this was worth the admission price alone. They were on immediately after the interval, and that was well planned as the wire supports for their net were strung up across the gangways during the break, meaning everyone had to duck under or climb over to go about their business. Every single kid must surely have asked "What is this for?" Clever planning by the circus!

All too soon it was over......me and Sam headed out to find the car, and got a bit lost. Turned a corner and came face to face with Chico Rico the clown, outside his caravan! Sam and Chico had a lovely chat for a couple of minutes - thanks Chico. Yet again a good day out is made even better with a piece of good luck for us, it always seems to happen, I LOVE karma!

We made our way out of the parking area VERY slowly, we were letting EVERYONE out before us cos we were both in a fantastically silly mood. We also had The View playing (at "one and one volume Daddy") so everyone knew we were the coolest kids in the playground. Daddy did air drums, Sam did a bit of air guitar but mainly conducted the band with his flashy-light toy from the circus. I'd like to store up the emotions I had at that time for as long as possible, because I don't imagine life can get any better. We were both being stupid and laughing our heads off oblivious to anyone else around us, and I just know that it won't always be like this. Got home, ham sandwiches,,,,,,bathtime....

Broken Mateyman!

Bath was really good fun! We again had dolphin v beaver swimming races (don't ask) and inevitably we had a splashdown, culminating in filling up one on the Mateymen with water and launching him as high as possible to crash back into the bath water for a massive splash. One this occasion it was Captain Crazy who was the "lucky" dive bomber. We learned something today! When a Mateyman lands headfirst on the side of the bath (even if it IS on tp of a rubber duck) his hat breaks! When we retrieved Capn Crazy from the water, after wiping the water off our faces, his hat was broken, which prompted "OOOOPS" folloed by AAAAAHGAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! Guss Capn Crazy wasn't getting the sympathy he perhaps craved. In all fairness, he had enough bottle to try again, and again crash landed on the side of the bath, resulting in more hat damage and more hysterical laughter. Poor old Captain Crazy. The newest admission to the Matey Men club, yet the only damaged on so far!

Concert For Diana

Good idea. Raise awareness and money. But what a CRAP bill! Elton John, Duran Duran, Take Bloody That? Well, I guess it appeals to a "certain" target audience.....absolutely crap music though, what a shame. Nice to see the two Princes on stage reading off prompt cards, well done chaps, good effort. I wonder if Prince Charles is there?

Big Decisions

I was going to do a whole separate blog on this but it is easier to sneak it in here. I have some BIG choices to make, and soon, but I'm really struggling. Jobs. Careers. Relationships.

Actually, thinking about it, I am not gonna go into it all just yet, I need more time to think first.....

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Crap Parking League XI

Source: Eddie2sox
Sunday 1st July 2007, 3:15pm

On the way home today I popped into the shop for some essentials, and found meself almost opposite this travesty.....

Yet another new shape Mini!

What is it about these small cars that they are impossible to park properly? Does the steering not work correctly? Does the windscreen distort the view? Who knows, but it's weird. New Mini now storming ahead of the competition.

Table:

New Shape Mini.....4

VW Bora.....1.5

Vauxhall Vectra.....1.5

Honda Civic.....1

Vauxhall Corsa.....1

Vauxhall Combo van.....1

VW Golf.....1

Peugeot 206.....1

Mystery Rover.....1

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Smoking Ban - First Impressions

Source: Eddie2sox
Sunday 1st July 2007, 3:10pm

Well, I popped down to the Woolpack at about half past twelve this afternoon....

....usually there would be 10/15 people in already. Today? Two. And Old Bob and Captain Ted soon left, to go home to watch the Grand Prix and have a smoke.

Picture is just after they left.

This is just a first impression of course, but to see The Woolpack devoid of punters on a Sunday afternoon is, frankly, unsettling. I hope it picks up when people get bored staying at home!

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